


Fix Her

by teeteeAOS



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-18
Updated: 2017-06-30
Packaged: 2018-09-25 10:09:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 33
Words: 33,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9814772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teeteeAOS/pseuds/teeteeAOS
Summary: Melinda's time spent in the Framework has had a bad effect on her brain - this is the story of how they try to help her with everything they have.





	1. Chapter 1

„Once again, agent May.“ Fitz’s voice is quiet and calm. He’s doing something on his tablet, not looking at May at all. He knows how uncomfortable it is to have someone staring at you all the time while you’re struggling with words. He’s been through this as well so he can relate. The guilt is strong and he needs to help her as much as possible.

„I-I…words…it’s…“ Everything is just one big mess in her head, she knows what she wants to say but words just don’t come out in order or they don’t come out at all. It’s frustrating, she’s never been a woman of many words but not being able to say a single correct sentence is just too much.

„I know, it’s hard but you gotta try again.“ Fitz is still not looking at her, giving her some space for herself and her messy thoughts.

„No…n-n-no use…“She closes the book that Fitz has given her. It’s a book about atoms, not something May would get her hands on if it was necessary for her to choose a book. 

Someone is watching them – behind a huge lab window is standing Coulson. His robotic hand is leaning against the cold window and his posture is relaxed, though it can’t be said about his mind. He feels guilty as much as Fitz, maybe even more. He’s never seen her like that, so fragile and so vulnerable.

„How’s she holding up?“ Jemma asks as she’s passing the labs. She stops for a moment, though, looking through the window at May and Fitz. A sad smile forms on her lips as Fitz leans his small hand on May’s shoulder.

„Still the same.“ Coulson is not in a mood for talking, not now that May can’t talk at all. He feels so bad for her but he can’t say it out loud, it’d make her feel bad either.

„We’ll go through it, together.“ Jemma lies her hand on Coulsons arm and she maintains this position for a couple of seconds to let him know she’s there for him. He appreciates that, he really does, but he can’t focus on anything else but Melinda.

Fitz is alone in the lab later that day, working on some devices that may help May. He’s trying to make Framework work the other way round. He’s sure that if it can make so much harm on a human’s brain, it can also make a lot of good, he just needs to figure it out. He feels Jemma’s presence even before she speaks up. He turns around and meets her eyes.

„Hi.“

„Hey.“

„So, how’s it going with agent May?“ Jemma asks very politely, she can see how much he struggles to make her brain work the same way it used to.

„I don’t know, Jemma. I don’t know how to help her. She’s just…she doesn’t want to read and communicate. I can see it every time she comes down to our daily meeting. I can see how much she wants to be done with it and go to her bunk, lock herself from the outer world. I want to help her so much but it’s hard.“ He rubs his eyes while talking. He seems tired and frustrated. 

„It reminds me of someone.“ Is all that Jemma says and it makes Fitz look at her again. He knows what she’s referring to. He was the same – he didn’t want any help, he didn’t want to embarrass himself in front of other people so he didn’t speak.

„We need to find a way.“ He turns back to his work and Jemma leaves because she knows he needs to be alone.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

„May? You there?“ Coulson knocks on her door, trying not to sound desperate. May has disappeared after her session with Fitz and he knows she’s most likely in her bunk, trying to be as distant as possible.

„May, please. I’ve brought tea.“ Still nothing. He fights the urge to use his robotic hand and open the door himself.

„Please, just…open the door.“ He begs her to open the door. He knows she’s there, he can hear her as she’s moving closer.

„G-go…“ Her voice is quiet, it’s almost like a whisper. He doesn’t want her to be alone and he’s willing to wait until she opens the door. He’s not leaving her.

„Let me help you.“ He tries to sound calm and friendly, exactly how his voice is supposed to sound.

„Go aw-way, Ph…Ph.“ It just hits him straight to his heart – she can’t say his name, even though she badly wants to, she can’t. He wants to wrap his arms around her and never let her go but there is something standing in his way – the door.

„No. I’m not going anywhere.“ He leans on the wall. He remains in the same position for a while until he’s tired of standing so he’s slowly sitting down. Other agents are passing and staring at him, of course they are – it’s the middle of the day - they are all working but he, on the other hand, is sitting there, waiting for a response from a woman that won’t speak to him.

„Agent Coulson, director Mace wants to see you in his office now.“ Davies stops a few steps from Coulson. He can say that Coulson doesn’t want to go but orders are orders. Coulson gets up and nods at Davies, who got the message and goes away.

„I’ll come back to you later, OK?“ No response.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mace has some news for Phil and he may not like it at all...

Phil is now standing in front of Mace’s office. Well, more accurately, his office. He’s calling the shots again but since there aren’t many agents who know about that, Mace is still the _director_ and he is still _agent_ Coulson.

„Hey, Phil. Come in, sit down.“ He points at the seat in front of him.

„Jeffrey.“

„You want some coffee? Tea? Scotch, maybe?“ Phil has never liked this kind of behavior. It’s way too nice for his liking. Years of fighting Hydra, demons from different dimensions and other funny stuff have taught him a lesson or two.

„What do you want to talk about?“ He asks directly, he doesn’t want to waste any more time. He could be with Melinda now so he want’s to be done with Mace as soon as possible.

„Strike team has brought Radcliff to the base.“ Mace’s voice is low now.

„I see.“

„Our medics were able to fix him. Next time you shouldn’t order agent Johnson to quake his life out of him.“ It was a really bad attempt at humor. Phil doesn’t have fun at all. His blood is boiling in his veins, the man that has put May in this condition is alive and in the same building as his team. 

„I didn’t order her to do that.“

„I know. Look, he’ll be ready for interrogation in 2 days, more or less.“ 

„I’ll do it.“ Phil is not sure if he’s able to face him but he wants to have a word with this man any way.

„Phil…we need him alive.“ Phil gets up and heads to the direction of exit.

„Don’t worry about this.“

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

Where the hell are they? We are supposed to relax now, it’s Friday night.“ Mack is pacing up and down in their common area with a bottle of beer in one hand. Elena is sitting on a huge black sofa with her own beer. 

„Don’t be so impatient, turtle-man.“

„She’s right Mack, or is that turtle-man now?“ Daisy appears in the door, leaning against its frame.

„Took you ages, Tremors. Here’s your beer.“ He hands her a bottle but she doesn’t reach for it, instead she turns her head aside a little bit.

„What?“

„Radcliff’s on the base. They transported him this morning.“ 

„And you want to talk about this now?“ Mack seems hurt, he wants Friday nights to be relaxing for everone, not just for him and Elena.

„This is personal, Mack.“ It’s been personal ever since they learnt about robo May.

„Yeah, it is. Fine, see you around then. Don’t you know if others are coming?“ He sounds hopeful.

„Well, Fitz’s working late again but Jemma may come around.“ 

„And…Coulson? Mace?...May?“ He already knows the answer to his stupid question but he’s waiting for her reply any way. He feels Elena’s hand on his giant arm.

„No. They’re fighting their demons tonight.“

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

„May? I’m back, OK?“ Phil doesn’t bother with knocking this time, he knows she won’t open the door. It’d be a huge surprise if she actually let him in. He sits down and leans his back on the cold wall, he mirrors the same position he was in earlier that day.

„Hah, this actually reminds me of one of our earlier missions. Someone has locked you in a closet, you remember?“ No response, again. He doesn’t give up, though. He’ll never give up on her.

„Despite their bad manners, I like people from Madrid…“

„P…P-pari-s…“ She speaks up, making him blink in surprise. Sure, it was Paris. How could he forget?

„Right, Paris. Thank you, May.“ He doesn’t just thank her for correcting his statement, he thanks her for everything. He wishes she could read his mind now, it’d make things easier. She doesn’t say anything else and they both sink into a comfortable silence.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil learns what is really wrong with May...

„…and then I went straight to agent Davies. It was funny because I thought it was director Mace so I said-.“ Fitz suddenly stops. He notices that agent May is struggling with her breath.

„Is everything okay, agent May?“ He steps closer to see what’s going on. 

„I-I…fin-e. No…worry.“ She doesn’t seem fine but Fitz doesn’t want to push her. He’ll talk to Jemma later today, it should be fine.

„Should I call agent Coulson?“ He tries.

„N-no!“ Her eyes widen and she makes her way to the nearest medical table. It’s become her safe place.

„Okay then, so what do you think, should I buy a green tie or an orange one?“ He knows he’s talking about an absolute nonsense but he also knows that this nonsense helped him back then and it can help her, too.

„I-I…gre-en…nice.“ She does that again – every time she finishes a failed attempt on a proper sentence, she clenches her fists and looks down. It breaks Fitz’s heart because he can’t help her.

„I also think so. Let’s read something.“ He reaches for books he’s put on his table. He can tell she didn’t like the book on atoms so he’s found his old Harry Potter book. 

„S-stop.“

„Stop what?“ 

„Stop…th-is.“ She swallows and turns her head aside but he’s noticed tears forming in her eyes. 

„I take it you don’t like Harry Potter, never mind, I think I have some books on ancient empires in my bunk.“ Fitz usually doesn’t smile at anyone else but Jemma but right now he feels like it’s the only thing he can do for her. She doesn’t say anything else.

„So are we done today?“ He asks politely and she nods. Their session lasted only for 23 minutes and Fitz is getting stressed – how is he supposed to help her like that?

She makes her way to the exit and she bumps into someone. Someone called Phil Coulson. He catches her shoulders to make them steady.

„Whoo, careful. I’m happy to see you, though.“ He smiles down at her. He doesn’t really understand how love works but it does strange things to him.

„D-don…don-n’t.“ She doesn’t even exchange any look with him as she’s getting rid of his hands. She leaves him there, standing and wondering what he did wrong. He doesn’t waste any time and a second later he bursts into Fitz’s lab.

„What’s wrong with May?“ Phil surprised Fitz who has been eating his sandwich and going through some documents that they’ve found in Radcliff’s house.

„Except the fact that she struggles with speaking?“ Fitz asks.

„This is not funny, Fitz.“

„And I’m not joking, OK?!“ Fitz raises his voice. He knows he shouldn’t behave like that, especially while the person that is receiving his anger is Coulson. 

„And I’m sorry, sir.“ He apologizes before Coulson can react. Coulson puts his sad smile on, the one Fitz has seen multiple times over the last few weeks.

„I understand…I just…what’s exactly wrong with her?“

„Wait, you don’t know? I mean, Jemma didn’t tell you?“ Fitz blinks in surprise, he thought Jemma (or someone else) has told him what really is wrong with agent May.

„No, she didn’t“

„Okay…so, have a look.“ Fitz passes him a tablet with some pictures and parameters. Coulson graduated from Operations, not from Science so he throws a glare at Fitz.

„This…“ Fitz points at a picture of a brain.

„…is a brain of a healthy person, no red places as you can see, and this…this is agent May’s brain.“ Coulson is looking at the picture, not a bit smarter than he was a few seconds ago.

„Okay, so May’s brain has a lot of red places on it but what does that mean?“

„She’s been in the Framework for weeks, her brain cells got used to the new world she was put in. It means that her cells didn’t have to do some of their…well, let’s say work, because it was mainly her imagination that was doing the main job. For instance, she didn’t speak in the Framework, I mean, she did but inside of her head, obviously, so that’s the reason why she can’t form proper sentences now.“ Fitz finishes his rant on Melinda’s status and Phil can’t believe his ears. He’s slowly getting the message:

„So, basically, if we put her back to the Framework, she’d get back to normal?“

„Hypotethically speaking, yes, but there are some other factors that can have an effect on this kind of recovery…she can die.“

„What?!“ Coulson is alarmed, he wouldn’t survive losing her again.

„If we put her back to the Framework, her brain cells could simply give up because of all the changes they‘d go through so putting her back to the Framework is out of option…for now.“ Even though Fitz is holding a sandwich in his hand, it’s the last thing he’s thinking about.

„For now?“

„I’m working on a way to use the Framework to repair her brain cells. It’s still in the process but with some time given I think it will work. In the meantime…“ They exchange looks.

„…in the meantime we need to try our best to improve her status without Radcliff’s hocus-pocus.“ Coulson finishes it for him, letting him know he got the message.

„Well, technically, I developed the Framework…he just used the idea to create this hell of a weapon.“

„One more thing, Fitz. Don’t ever test anything on her without my permission, even if she demands it, just don’t do that.“Coulson is pretty serious now and Fitz is aware of his 'I don’t take no as an answer' glare.

„But sir-.“

„That’s an order, agent Fitz.“

„Y-yes , sir. Don’t worry, sir.“ Coulson pats him on the back and leaves him alone with his sandwich and thoughts.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

Melinda badly wants to punch something. She knows that it doesn’t work that way but right now she’s willing to pretend she’s never said anything about punching being a bad way to release some tension. She’s lucky – no one is in the gym and she doubts someone will come around since she’s heard agents talking about some kind of a watchdog mission.

She wants to help them with their missions but how if she can’t even say ‚watch out‘? After a few minutes of punching she can hear steps. Someone has entered the gym, perfect, another agent who will pretend not to feel sorry for her.

„You forgot to put your bandages on, you can hurt yourself.“ A very similar voice rings in her ears – Simmons. Of course she’s forgotten to put her bandages on, she can’t even ask for them! 

„I…ok-kay…no wor-ry.“ She punches even harder. She wants to feel pain, she wants to remind herself that she’s still a human being, not a broken _robot_.

„Agent May, stop! This is not the way to solve this.“Jemma knows she can’t just come closer and stop her because it could end up with her back pinned to the wall, or worse. 

„F-feels…goo-d-d.“ Jemma can see blood trails on the punching bag, agent May’s hurt herself again. Jemma has a lot of work to do but she’s willing to wait until agent May stops so she can patch her bloody knuckles. That’s all she can do to help her right now and it hurts. May suddenly stops and holds the punching bag, breathing heavily. Jemma is by her side in a second.

„Agent May! What’s going on? Talk to me!“ _Talk to me_ , like I can you genius – Melinda thinks.

„L-let…g-go..o-o-of…ughrrr.“ Melinda straightens up, grabs her towel and rushes out of the gym, leaving Jemma staring after her. It’s not surprising at all.


	4. Chapter 4

It’s 2am and the base is calm and quiet. No one is around so it’s a perfect time for Melinda to get something to eat.She finally can enjoy her meal without agents staring at her. Oh how much she loves those alone times. She kinda misses her plane, her BUS, where she could hide in the cockpit without anyone looking for her. She opens a fridge and reaches for a plate with a small yellow note on it.

_I didn’t know what to cook, hope you like salmon. Enjoy your meal and throw me a smile next time, Phil._

  
A soft smile is forming on her face as she keeps reading the note over and over again. She realises something – other agents are looking at her like something’s changed but Phil is still the same Phil. She hates herself for pushing him away but she has no idea how to stop this terrible habit of hers.

„Keep reading.“ She hears a familiar voice in the background of the kitchen, she didn’t notice anyone else’s presence. It’s Phil.

„I didn’t want to scare you, I’ll go.“ He is about to leave but her voice stops him.

„S-st…st-t.“ Phil wants to make it easier for her so he speaks up:

„Stop, yeah, I know. I won’t push you.“

„Stay.“ The world suddenly stops for him, did she really said what he believes she just said? He’s been waiting for this moment for weeks.

„So you want me to watch you? While eating?“ He grins and sits down. She can’t fight the urge to smile, he’s always been a dork.

„A-ass…“

„You want me to watch your ass? Is that what you want?“ His grin is wider and he can say that she enjoys this little banter. She’s always had.

„Yo-u…d-dork.“

„Please, don’t ever stop calling me that. It sounds so nice.“ There is some truth in what he just said.

„Y-yes.“

„So go ahead, eat.“ He points at the plate she’s holding.

„I know you’re not a fan of lemon so I did some magic with seasoning. It should be tasty enough. In case you don’t like it, I can fix you something else.“ She doesn’t understand why he’s so nice at her, it was her idea to use the Darkhold after all, he should be angry and disappointed.

„Wh-why?“

„Uhmm well, I don’t want you to be hungry and-…wait, it’s not what you want to know, right?“ He’s still the same dork, still the same Phil she’s known since their first missions together.

„Yo-ou so n-nice..I-I’m…bad.“ It’s not exactly what she wants to say but as far as something leaves her mouth, it’s fine.

„No, no, no! No bad, you’re not bad! Nothing of that is your fault, Melinda. Stop blaming yourself.“ His voice is still so gentle and calm.

„I-I …the b-b-book…d-did…“ She doesn’t need to struggle anymore because Phil somehow always knows what she wants to say.

„You did all you could to bring us back. You did great.“ He tries to assure her that it was the right move to make, even though he’s not so sure.

„M-me selfi…selfish.“

„Selfish? Maybe. It just makes us a perfect couple.“ She throws a surprised look at him and he suddenly gets what he just said. Damn.

„I mean, we are good partners…COLLEAGUES!“ She has to laugh at him now and it makes him want to hug her or maybe record it so he could watch her beautiful smile all days long.

„Y-you a-are…b-b-big dork.“

„Come here.“ He tries, he knows she might feel uncomfortable by his request but he really wants to hug her now. To his surprise, she’s moving closer to him until she stands right in front of the chair he’s sitting on. He gently gets his hands on her waist, still sitting. She looks down at him and he can see tears and fear.

„Hey, let’s do that ass staring thing.“ She hits him hard to his shoulder but at least she’s smiling, that’s all he needs right now.

„Ouch, you certainly didn’t lose your temper.“

„T-thanks.“

„Anytime.“ He throws one of his lovesick glances at her and they remain like that for a couple of minutes before it’s time to go to their beds again.


	5. Chapter 5

„Looking at agent Coulson is like looking at two sides of the same coin…I mean, he’s so happy and gentle around agent May but once she’s not around he’s worried and sad.“ Jemma is watching an interaction between May and Coulson, he’s come to see her after his mission.

„Uh yeah, of course he’s worried, Jemma. He knows what can happen to her and-.“

„Wait, you told him?!“ Jemma seems alarmed, upset even, and Fitz has no idea what’s wrong. He goes through the words that just left his mouth but he can’t find anything particularly bad.

„Yes, he deserved to know. Besides, I’m surprised you hadn’t told him before.“

„He couldn’t know! Oh, Fitz! What have you done?“She rubs her eyes and sights. Fitz still doesn’t understand what’s going on and he desperately wants to know.

„But Jemma, why would you keep this from him?! He’s her best friend, colleague, partner…everything. You can’t keep things like that from him, it’s not your place to decide!“

„It’s agent May’s decision!“

„What?!“

„She asked me to do that, she doesn’t want him to know.“ Jemma seems hopeless.

„How could…?“

„She’s written a letter. She asked me to keep this from Coulson as long as possible. It makes sense, you know.“ Fitz is slowly getting Jemma’s words. It only takes a few seconds to realize that he's done a terrible thing. 

„Oh, my God, I’m so sorry, Jemma. I didn’t know.“

„Well, let’s hope he doesn‘t bring that up.“ They both look at Coulson and May, they are both smiling and eating their noodles.

„Can I see the letter?“ Fitz asks after a few minutes of silence. 

„Why? I mean, I promised I wouldn’t show it to anyone.“

„Maybe it can help me to understand what’s going on in her head.“ Jemma reaches for her bag. She hesitates for a moment. Does she really want to break this promise? But it’s for agent May’s own good.

„Don’t tell her I let you read it, I don’t think a black eye would suit me.“ She hands him the paper and he smiles at her.

„Everything suits you but no worries, I won’t say a word.“ He doesn’t read the letter until Jemma leaves the lab. He tries to seem okay when they are in the same room together but deep down he feels desperate. Maybe this letter can help him to solve agent May’s problem. He reads.

_Jemma, first of all, this is for your eyes only – I don’t want anyone else to know that I had to write a letter, it’s humiliating as it is. I never asked you for anything nor had any special request but right now I need your help. You know well enough that there is something wrong with me and because of this little error I can’t form a normal sentence and do a number of other normal things. I know you and Fitz have a scientific explanation for what’s happening to my brain but don’t say a word about that to Phil. He’s an idiot, he tends to worry a lot and he just can’t know. Don’t say anything about chances of my recovery, either. Don’t give him hope. I’ve known him for long enough to know that he won’t get over it if I don’t get back to normal. I hate to admit that but it’d break me, too. Whatever happens from now on, please, make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid. I’m tired of pretending, he’s the most important person in my life and I don’t want to see him suffer. Jemma, please, do this for me._

Fitz’s, now teary, eyes are glued to this piece of paper and his mind is processing what he just read. 

„Oh, my God. What have I done.“


	6. Chapter 6

„May is getting better, isn’t she?“ Daisy asks Fitz as they both watch agent May leaving the room. Fitz smiles and takes some documents from Daisy.

„Yes, it seems like agent Coulson has a good effect on her.“ 

„But?“

„Huh?“ 

„It sounds like there’s a but…so…will you tell me what’s going on?“ Daisy crosses her arms and steps closer to Fitz so he can’t escape her questioning look. She’s learnt this from May.

„It’s nothing, I’m happy for them.“ He says quietly.

„Happy for them like…how?“She thinks she knows what he’s talking about but she wants to be 100% sure.

„Just look at them sometimes. They look happy.“ He doesn’t seem happy, though, and Daisy can see it but she decides not to comment on it.

„Sure, they look happy, but it doesn’t make them a couple, right?“She doesn’t believe they are together, as much as she wants them to be.

„I saw them on security cams.“ 

„You saw them doing what exactly?“Now it gets interesting. Maybe she’ll have something to gossip about in the next days. It’s been a while since she had time to share some fun and interesting stories about other agents, not that she’s mean, but sometimes it’s necessary to feel this kind of a human connection.

„Agent Coulson had his hands on agent May’s waist.“ Fitz is always so professional, he never says anything inappropriate that would make his friends blush. Daisy admires this side of him because she’s always been forthcoming and it sometimes can do more damage than good.

„And so what? I can put my hands on your waist right now and it won’t make us a couple, will it?“She’s fooling around a little bit, she needs this as much as she needs to breathe. It’s just a sign that she’s finally relieved – May seems to get better every day and it’s all that matters.

„Daisy!“

„Okay, okay, get it.“

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

„Here’s your lunch.“ Phil puts a plate full of various kinds of food in front of her. Melinda looks at it with widen eyes, how is she supposed to eat all of this?

„It’s t-too…much.“

„No, no, no. You’re going to eat properly and I’m going to be right there, watching you.“

„D-don’t…st-stare.“ She doesn’t like people staring at her while eating, not even Phil can do that. He just smiles and takes his own plate.

„Okay, I’ll just turn around with my own food but promise you won’t throw it away.“ He looks offended but she knows he’s just pretending. She starts eating as soon as he turns around but something’s not right. She can feel it. Her heart starts to beat really fast and she feels dizzy. Her hands are trembling and it’s getting really difficult to even breathe in. She tries to get up but unsuccessfully.

„Hey, not fair, I can hear you moving, which means that you’re throwing the food awa-.“ He can’t even finish his thought as he sees Melinda tottering with her head down. He’s by her side in a second. She’s slowly falling but he catches her.

„Oh, God, Mel, what’s wrong?!“ She’s numb so he sits down with her, letting her head lean on his chest. He doesn’t waste any time and reaches into his pocket for his mobile phone.

„Please, please pick it up.“ He says under his breath.

 _„Sir? I’m on a mission, can we talk lat-.“_ He doesn’t give her space to speak.

„It’s May! She’s not well, Simmons, she’s on verge of collapse, she’s passing out. What should I do?! Help me, please!“ The desperation in his voice is almost unbearable and Simmons wishes she could be on the base right now. She can hardly do something from where she is.

_„Okay, sir, calm down. First of all you need to call medics, wherever you are just call someone. Is she breathing?“_

„Yes, yes she’s breathing but she has struggles with it, Simmons, please, how can I help her?!“ She’s shaking so he holds her closer. He looks down at her and notices she’s bleeding from nose, this is not good.  
„She’s bleeding, Jemma, do something!“

 _„Wait a second, I’ll call someone. Just keep her warm and conscious.“_ She hungs up and he knows it’s just a matter of seconds when someone comes.

„Come on, Mel, don’t do this to me. Come on, stay awake.“ He tries to wipe the blood from her face so it’s easier for her to breathe. She’s still shaking so he gives her his jacket. He’s holding her really close, whispering soothing phrases to her ear.

„Coulson?!“ He can hear Daisy. Oh, thank God someone’s here.

„Daisy!“ Daisy, Mack, Fitz and a couple of medics are next to him right away. He doesn’t want to let go of her so he keeps holding her tight.

„Sir, we can’t do anything for her if you keep holding her like that.“ One of the medics tries to talk some sense into him, the medic’s voice is calm and professional. He lets them lay Melinda down and examine her status.

„Is she going to be ok?“ Coulson asks, eyes still glued to Melinda’s lying form. Daisy puts her hand gently on his shoulder.

„Coulson, let them do their work.“

„Daisy’s right, sir. Let’s go.“ Mack’s voice is gentle and it somehow makes Coulson feel better. She’ll be okay, she has to.

„I just talked to Simmons, she’s coming home.“ Fitz informs them as they all leave the common area. Jemma will take care of Melinda, he’s sure.


	7. Chapter 7

They’ve been waiting for information about Melinda over two hours. Daisy and Elena are sitting on a huge black bench that is situated right in front of a huge lab where medics disappeared with Melinda. Coulson is pacing up and down the hall, clearly very nervous. His shirt is still dirty from Melinda’s blood – it’s like Rosalind’s death all over again, except this time Phil knows he wouldn’t survive losing Melinda.

Door of the lab opens and one medic rushes somewhere with a little red plastic package – she must have lost blood. 

„Hey, how’s she?!“ Phil stands in his way and medic is forced to stop.

„Excuse me, sir, but I gotta go.“

„Coulson…no.“ Daisy gives him a soothing look and he lets the medic go. He doesn’t know what to do – he doesn’t know if May is okay and it’s killing him. After twenty minutes the door of the lab opens and Simmons comes out with an unreadable expression. Both Daisy and Elena get up and Coulson comes closer as well.

„So?“

„She’s stable but we still don’t know what exactly happened to her. We are running some tests, results should be available in 2 days.“ Coulson is not relieved at all, it still doesn’t answer his inner doubts.

„How is she? Can I see her?“ He asks, desperate to get to see her. Jemma can see it on his face but she’s not sure if it’s the best idea. 

„I think you should give yourself a break, take a shower and relax. Agent May is sleeping and she’s not waking up anytime soon.“ Jemma tries to give him a reason to get some rest but there is nothing that can stop him from getting to her.

„I don’t need to relax, not now. I just want to see her, Jemma, please.“Agent Coulson is pretty persuasive so Jemma doesn’t have any chance to convince him to do otherwise.

„Follow me.“Coulson and Jemma disappear in a huge white lab. Phil is probably more nervous than he was a few moments ago. He doesn’t know what to expect. 

There she is – lying on a white hospital bed, surrounded by various machines, sleeping. He slowly sits down. He hesitates for a second before he reaches for her cold hand. His thumb is gently brushing her soft skin. Coulson can’t help it but he feels tears forming in his eyes. Jemma feels like it’s the right time to leave him alone with her, she doesn’t want to make him feel uncomfortable.

„Everything’s gonna be alright, May. You’ll be fine and then I’ll take you somewhere nice, just you and me.“ He’s made a decision – he’ll tell her about his feelings once she wakes up. No regrets from now on!

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

„Here, drink.“ Daisy hands a bottle of beer to Jemma that is working late in her lab. Jemma doesn’t take the beer, though, she just sights.

„It’s been a hell of a day, no need for making it worse, I’m sorry.“

„I understand. So. What do you think is wrong with May?“ Jemma’s been expecting her to ask about May.

„There are about ten different scenarios.“

„And your fave is…?“ Daisy doesn’t want to leave until she gets some answers from Jemma.

„Well, it seems like her body suffers in the same way as her brain. Her body shows very similar reactions, long story short it refuses our reality because it was used to live in the Framework, if that make any sense.“ Jemma is not the best person to explain something like that to someone like Daisy, not that Daisy is not smart – she is,but she doesn’t have the same science practice as Jemma and it makes it more difficult to explain certain things.

„But what does that mean?“

„Hmm, her body is basically giving up. It wants back to the Framework.“

„Wait, her body is giving up? So it means that…“ Daisy doesn’t want to finish her thought. Jemma nods.

„There are still chances for her recovery, though.“ Jemma is always so hopeful, that’s something none of them has mastered over the years except Jemma.

„Tell me more.“

„It’s quite simple, she has to convince her mind that she wants to stay.“ Daisy knows that in May’s case it’s not as simple as it appeares to be.

„So we’ll need Coulson.“ They both can agree on this.


	8. Chapter 8

„Is she awake?“ Daisy asks Jemma that is filling some documents. Jemma doesn’t look up, though, she keeps focusing on what she’s doing.

„Jemma!“ Daisy has to raise her voice to make her look up at her. 

„Yes.“

„And?“ Daisy doesn’t like this new side of Jemma – she doesn’t say much. Her vocabulary is limited to yes, no, maybe, good and bad these days and it’s driving Daisy crazy.

„Nothing much, she doesn’t speak and we don’t know whether she can’t or whether she just doesn’t want to.“ 

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

„Hey, May. How are you feeling today?“ Phil enters the lab where she’s staying at. She doesn’t say a simple hello, doesn’t even look at him. She always stare at a random place in front of her, fighting with her own thoughts.

„Okay, I won’t get a hello today, never mind. Look, I’ve brought dietary snacks, Jemma said it was okay to eat this.“ He puts all snacks he’s brought down on a medical table, right next to injections that are ready for Melinda in case she gets the shock again. He frozes for a second, a cold wave rushes down his spine.

She still doesn’t look at him and it still doesn’t change anything. He never changes his approach, he wants to be there for her.

„I’ll take one snack…if that’s okay with you, I’m quite hungry.“ He reaches for something that is supposed to look like a chocolate stick. He doesn’t like those snacks at all, it doesn’t taste good…well, it doesn’t taste at all but he wants to go through everything she has to so he only eats this and other food Melinda can eat.

She’s still looking ahead. She’s lost some weight, Phil can see that. Her cheek bones are more visible now. He’s always loved her cheek bones in combination with her brisk smile. Now he gets only the cheek bones. He’s looking at her, seeing every single thing that has change but he keep reminding himself that this is the Melinda he’s known for decades – his Melinda. Something has changed and some tears are falling down her cheeks. Phil doesn’t know what’s going on or what he’s supposed to do but Melinda is crying and he probably should do something.

„Mel? What’s up?“ No reply, just only tears running down her face. He moves the chair closer so he can wipe the tears away with his thumb. She doesn’t flinch, which makes him worried even more.

„What’s wrong?“ He tries hard not to sound desperate. She lowers her head to her hands and starts sobbing. Phil gets up and sits on the edge of her bed. He offers his embrace but she doesn’t move closer.

„Come here.“ He tries but she keeps her head down, sobbing. Now it’s the right time to do a move, he snuggles closer, taking her into his arms.

„I-It…use-less…“ She manages to say between her sobs. He doesn’t say anything, just holds her fighter.

„I-I…use-less.“ It breaks his heart, how can she think that?

„No, you’re not useless, Melinda.“ He tells her the truth, in his eyes she will never be useless. She shakes her head as well as she shakes off his arms.

„G-go.“

„I’m not leaving you alone.“

„L-let…me…be.“ She raises her voice a little bit, Phil doesn’t seem to be leaving anytime soon.

„No.“

„S-scre-ew … you!“ It doesn’t stop him from sitting there on the edge of her bed. He’s not leaving.

„Yeah, maybe, but I’m still not leaving.“ 

„D-do…not-t … w-waste t-t-time.“ She manages to say and turns her body around so she can leave the bed. She totters a bit when her feet meet the cold floor.

„Melinda, stop…“ Phil warns her, she’s way too stubborn for his liking. He can’t believe that he used to admire her stubbornness. She doesn’t stop and tries to walk away from Phil but she falls down. He’s by her side in a moment, trying to help her but she shakes his hands off again.

„D-don’t…t-t-touch.“ She’s lying there on the floor and he doesn’t know what to do. She won’t allow him to touch her so the only thing he can do is to call Jemma.

„Is everything okay, sir? Oh, my God!“ Jemma rushes to them and helps Melinda up.

„What happened?“ Phil shrugs his shoulders and leaves the lab in tears.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

„Have you seen Coulson?“ Mack asks Daisy as he enters her bunk.

„No, what’s wrong?“ She straightens.

„Jemma told me there had been an incident in May’s room this morning.“ Daisy looks at him with an alarmed look on her face.

„What?!“

„I don’t know much, May fell down or something and Coulson left the room, crying.“

„Coulson and…crying?“ Daisy can’t believe her ears.

„Yeah.“

„This is bad.“


	9. Chapter 9

Daisy is standing in front of an entrance to Coulson’s bunk. She takes some time to think of what she’s gonna say. Despide all kills under Coulson’s belt, he’s still a very sensitive and gentle man.

„Coulson? May I come in?“ She doesn’t expect him to open the door so she turns around and is about to leave when Coulson opens. She looks surprised but is glad that she can be with him.

They sit down on his bed, quiet. He’s looking at his hands that are folded on his lap. Daisy can say he’s been crying, his eyes are red and his look is distant – it’s like his mind is far from where they sit on the bed.

„She’ll be fine.“ She suddenly says. He shrugs.

„She needs help but she avoids it as much as she can…how the hell can we help her?“ He doesn’t want to sound harsh but given the situation, he can’t help it.

„Fitz and Simmons will find a way, they always do. Eventually, we’ll be able to help her, you’ll see.“ She puts her small hand on his shoulder, trying to comfort him as much as he lets her. He rubs his eyes with his fingers, visibly tired of crying and the current status of Melinda.

„I just want to be with her, Daisy. I’ve waited long enough…I want to tell her but she won’t let me. Damn it, I want her to know that despite her current condition she’s still the woman I lo-.“ He stops and swallows.

„Say it.“ Daisy wants him to say that out loud because it may help him to find hope.

„I-I love her.“

„Good.“ She hugs him and he’s glad she has such a wonderful team.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

„…and we can make it work like that and…“ Fitz and Simmons are working in Fitz’s lab and it’s not a big surprise to know that they’re working on a way to help May. She refuses talking to Fitz like she used to before her breakdown so now their only chance is to find out how to use the Framework to make her function again.

„Mace wants to give you some parameters for his new suit, he’s waiting for you in his office.“ Mack and Elena stops by with a message for Fitz.

„Tell him I’ll come around when we get this to work, thank you.“ Fitz doesn’t even look at Mack and it makes him upset so he comes closer and stops his movement.

„Turbo, he’s waiting for you now.“ Mack’s voice is firm but it doesn’t make Fitz intimidated. Jemma steps closer as well, just in case Fitz needs some help or alibi. 

„I’m sorry Mack, I have a lot of work to do and Mace is not my priority now.“ It’s not the Fitz they used to know a few years ago, now he’s driven and more confident. 

„And what is your priority?! A device that did more harm than good? A woman that can’t speak?“ Both Jemma and Elena look at Mack with an alarmed look. 

„She can speak! The words just don’t come out in the right order and yes! She’s my priority now, what are you going to do about it?!“ Fitz raises his voice and Mack frowns.

„I’m just trying to talk some sense into you. Instead of focusing on our missions you focus on something that doesn’t seem to work!“ 

„It will work! And I’m focusing on my mission! My mission is to help agent May and that’s what I’m doing! I know I’m the one who’s doing the right thing so don’t you dare to tell me otherwise!“ FItz’s finger slightly brushes Mack’s chest, it seems like Fitz doesn’t know fear because if Mack wanted to, he could end him in a minute.

„The right thing? You’re just wasting your time!“ Mack strikes back.

„Mack!“ Jemma interrupts their little talk because it’s getting worse and meaner. 

„What?! It’s true. You guys are trying to help someone who doesn’t want your help. She should have stayed in the Framework…“ This last comment makes Fitz furious and Jemma knows now there is no going back, once Fitz gets to this point, it’s bad.

„What the hell, Mack?! How could you possibly say something like that?! How can you give up on someone who’s never given up on us?! She’s saved our lives and she’s the reason why we are all still alive and you’re saying we should just give up?! Don’t you ever dare to say that again and don’t you dare to say that in front of Coulson! Never!“ Fitz is really loud and it’s caught attention of agents that are passing by the lab.

„You’re not thinking straight, Fitz! You said that yourself, she was happy in the Framework and now look at her! She’s suffering. Just get her back to that goddamned place!“

„Never! She was the one who helped me the most when I had the same problem so I’m not giving up on her! If you said this in front of Coulson, you’d be dead by now!“

„Guys!“ Elena speaks up.

„What the hell is going on?“ Mace appears in the door with crossed arms. Fitz steps away from Mack and hands a tablet to Mace.

„Nothing is going on. Here, type down the parameters, there is no time left to be wasted.“ Fitz leaves the lab and Jemma follows him.


	10. Chapter 10

„Fitz, where are you going?!“ Jemma calls after Fitz as he’s rushing in the direction of their bunk. He doesn’t stop nor slow down so she has to qicken her steps.

„Fitz, wait!“

„I can’t take it anymore.“

„What are you talking about?“ He suddenly stops and turns around so Jemma bumps into him.

„I have a plan, Jemma. Just let me do it.“ She nods, confused but hopeful. He opens their door and heads straight to their large book shelf. He’s looking for something for about two minutes when he finally gets his hands on it.

„Gotcha.“ Jemma can’t see what kind of book he’s holding but she doesn’t have time to ask him about it – he rushes back in the direction of May’s lab. He doesn’t knock, doesn’t even say hi.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

„Good to see you’re awake, we’re having a reading session now.“ He stands in front of her bed. She doesn’t seem to care much, she’s sure that he’ll leave eventually when she shows zero interest in what he wants to do.

„N-no-.“ He interrupts her as soon as she speaks up.

„No, agent May, we’re having that session!“ He raises his voice. It’s not something May is familiar with so she looks surprised.

„It…i-is …wa-waste.“ She manages to say and he crosses his arms.

„No! It’s not a freaking waste, don’t you get it?! You’re are damaged, I understand, I was there, too, but you need to get up! Agent May I know never gives up! Never! She fights for life, for us! We are all here for you!“ She’s silent as she’s processing what he just said. It takes a moment for her to think of something to say.

„I-I…sh-should…d-die…“ It’s like a punch to the guts for Fitz, what the hell is she talking about?

„What the…No! No way, you’re not giving up, agent May. Damn it! Don’t you see how important you are?! Huh?! Do you remember this?!“ He throws the book he was holding on a table next to her bed. She looks at it briefly. It’s a book about dragons.

„This book, it probably means nothing to you but for me it’s one of the most important things in my life. You’ve given me the book, I remember the day clearly. I wanted to give up, to walk away…to die. You were yelling at me and telling me to stop being stupid. You were the one who threw this book at me and told me to read out loud! You still don’t see how much we all care about you, Coulson especially…“ She throws an alarmed look at him. Coulson, of course, how could she forget about his lovesick glances.

„… I’ll leave you alone now but I’ll come back later today. I’ll always come back, agent May.“ He runs his hand through his hair and leaves, leaving her with a questioning look on her face. Now she has some time to reflect on her actions and thoughts.


	11. Chapter 11

It’s been an hour since Fitz’s burst of emotions. She’s still sitting in the same position on her bed, thinking of what’s been said between them. She’s come to a logical conclusion, Fitz is right – she needs to do something with herself. Of course, she could just give up and leave SHIELD and all the things she’s not able to do right now but this has been always just her side of the coin – she never thought of others, how they may feel about her decision. She’s always wanted to protect them and she just realised she’s been protecting them from her lately. But why? It’s not like she wants to hurt them physically, she doesn’t want to hurt them at all, yet she’s hurting them and it can’t keep happening. She’s made her decision – she’ll try to get up on her feet again – at this point literally since she’s trying to get up from her medical bed.

Her head hurts a little and she feels dizzy but she needs to get to Phil’s office and feel his presence – she’s not thinking straight, she knows she’s not in the best shape so the distance from Phil’s office and her room can make a serious harm.

She’s slowly getting through SHIELD corridors, trying not to be seen by many agents, especially by her team. She’s passing gym as she hears Phil’s voice. It makes her stop and listen.

„…and it should be the end of the mission. Inform others about details we’ve just come through.“ She comes closer to the door so she can hear better.

„Yes, sir.“ He’s talking to Piper. She wonders who has been training with them, maybe Phil…or Daisy.

„Great, see you around.“ He’s just about to leave as Piper’s voice stops him.

„Sir…“ 

„Hmm?“ 

„How’s agent May?“ Piper sounds worried and it breaks Melinda’s heart. She’s developed a special relationship with this young agent, she reminds her of her younger self. She remembers the time when she wanted to give her some flying lessons. It never happened, though. 

„She’s…I don’t know what to say…she hasn’t been herself lately.“ She can’t see him but she can tell he looks sad. His voice is quiet and in Phil’s case it means sadness.

„I see. So she’s not coming with us on that mission.“ Piper’s voice also sounds sad.

„She’s not coming with us.“ He states and runs his hand through his hair. 

„Can you please tell her that I miss her? I MEAN WE, we miss her, you know, me, Prince…“

„Why me?“ Phil asks with a very surprised look on his face.

„You and agent May seem close so I thought you’d get this message to her…“

„Do we look close?“ He asks with an amused voice. It makes Melinda smiles as well, it’s always been fun to see people thinking they are something more.

„Yeah, pretty close, like husband-wife close.“ 

„Hah, believe me or not but you’re not the first person telling me this.“

„You look good together.“ Piper suddenly says and catches Phil off guard. 

„Excuse me?“

„You and agent May…you would make a great couple.“ It surprises Phil quite a bit, he never talked with Piper like that before. He doesn’t know how to respond. If he said he didn’t think so, he’d be lying. It seems like Piper knows what’s up so she doesn’t demand any kind of response, she just smiles.

„If there is someone who can help her, it’s you, sir.“ Both Melinda and Phil has to smile at Piper’s words. Melinda is slowly getting to Phil’s office so she doesn’t know if they keep talking or not, she wants to reach his office before him.

Phil doesn’t get to his office right away – he meets Daisy and Elena and exchanges a few words with them. He has no idea what kind of surprise is waiting for him in his office so he doesn’t feel the urge to rush. After a few minutes of talking with girls he finally reaches his destination. He opens the door and opens his mouth in surprise. Melinda is sitting on his desk like she always used to.

„What are you doing here, Melinda?“ He asks, sounding worried.

„I-I…am…wai-waiting y-you.“ She says and crosses arms on her chest, making a face of a slight discomfort – her body still hurts.

„Are you crazy?! You should stay in bed and rest, not to walk around the base like that!“ He’s super worried, she can tell.

„P-phil, I-I-.“ 

„How is this even possible, Melinda? I know you’ve always been stubborn but this is extreme! Come on, let’s get you back to your bed.“ He doesn’t let her finish her thought and moves closer, not making her feel uncomfortable, though. He knows she doesn’t like to be pushed.

„I-I..list-sten-.“ She tries again but he interrupts her, it’s almost like he’s not even listening to her.

„Or maybe it’ll be better if you stay here. You can take my bed, I can sleep on the couch…“He takes off his jacket and puts it on Melinda’s shoulders, just in case she’s cold and also because she smells really nice.

„P-phil-.“ She tries to tell him something but he’s too worried to pay attention to her words.

„Does it hurt? Do you need anything?!“

„P-ph.-„

„Are you thirsty? I can get you a glass of water. Or maybe water with vitamine? Do you like apples?“

„PHILLIP!“ His eyes widen, hard to say if he’s more surprised because she just called him Phillip or because she managed to say his name without any stutter. He takes his time to say something.

„Say that again.“ He’s now standing right in front of her, looking into her eyes, desperate to hear another correct word coming out of her mouth.

„Phillip.“ She says again, amazed and surprised as much as Phil. They are looking at each other, not sure what to do next. Phil smile is getting wider and Melinda mirrors the look on his face. They are both soon falling into laughing, both happy.

„Please, don’t stop calling me that.“ He says and rests his big hand on her smaller one.

„N-no…y-you ar-are Phil.“

„I’ll be an idiot if that makes you happy.“ He jokes around, still smiling.

„Y-you a-are an i-idiot.“ She teases him and he doesn’t min dat all. If it’s Melinda May who’s teasing him, he’s perfectly fine with that. 

„Why are you here?“ He suddenly remembers how their little talk began. She swallows, also remembering why she’s in his office.

„I-I a-am…n-not gi-giving u-p.“ For a brief moment he thinks it’s just a dream. It’s just too good to be true – she was refusing to accept their help a few hours ago and now she’s sitting on his desk, telling him she’s not giving up. It gotta be the best day of his life, a wave of happiness washing over him as she smiles at him.

„Of course you’re not, you’re Melinda May after all.“

„I-idiot.“ They sare another laughter and Phil gets serious again:

„Should I call Simmons? I mean, you’re not supposed to be here.“After so many days she smirks again. He’s missed her typical smirk that she used to give him every now and then. 

„C-co..co-ward.“

„She’ll find out, eventually.“ He points out and she jumps down from his desk, hissing.

„W-walk … m-me?“ 

„With pleasure.“ And they walk out of his office together.


	12. Chapter 12

„F-Fitz?“ He turns his head in the direction of a quiet voice that interrupts him from his work. He’s surprised to see agent May in the door, he’s not even sure if she’s allowed to leave her room.

„Agent May, is everything okay?“ He comes closer to make sure she’s fine. He can see her holding the book he earlier left in her room.

„R-read..I-I w-want…“ He doesn’t know what to say, he didn’t expect her to agree with his words, let alone come to his lab with a book. Though, there is something he should say out loud.

„I’m sorry, agent May…I shouldn’t have snapped like that before.“

„I-I…th-thank you.“ She doesn’t want him to feel about about what he said because she clearly remembers what she did while Fitz’s had the same struggles – she threw the book she’s now holding in her hands at him so she should apologize.

„So, let’s read then.“ Melinda opens the book and since Fitz is very perceptive he can tell that she’s been already reading on her own – she opens the book at page number 7. Fitz stops doing tests he wanted to do earlier and he pays attention to agent May’s reading. It’s rusty and she’s stuttering a lot but he knows beginnings are always the same. They’ve been sitting in his lab for more than two hours and he wonders where agent May’s newfound energy comes from.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

„Oh, Phil, I’ve been looking for you, I need to talk to you about something.“ Phil bumps into Mace in one of many SHIELD corridors. He was just about to visit Melinda but it probably has to wait.

„What is it?“

„I think we should go to my office…your office, I mean.“ He’s still used to call Phil’s office his office, he sometimes forgets he’s not the one who’s calling the shots anymore.

„Let’s go then.“ They get into his office in a minute, it’s because Phil is in rush to get to Melinda’s room. He wants to see her and spend some quality time with her.

„So, what do you want to talk about?“ Mace hands him a few documents regarding the thing he wants to talk about. Phil doesn’t read a single word, he waits for him to speak up, speaking is faster than reading, after all.

„There was an incident with Watchdogs in New York. Surprisingly, they weren’t following any inhuman. They were after this woman.“ Mace throws a photo of a young woman on the table. Phil knows who’s Mace talking about in a second, it takes him just one look at the photo and he knows.

„Audrey…“

„Yes, I know you guys used to be close so I assume Watchdogs have found out about your relationship with Miss Nathan and they are trying to track her down, maybe even hurt her.“ Phil has his eyes glued to the picture of Audrey, millions thoughts going on in his head.

„Where is she now?“ He asks with a slight worry in his voice.

„She’s in our facility in New York.“ Phil shakes his head.

„No, bring her here, no one knows where’s the Playground, she’ll be safe here.“

„What about you…she doesn’t know you’re still alive, does she?“ Mace asks and carefully watches Phil’s reaction. He doesn’t even flinch, it seems like he’s made his decision.

„Bring her in…it’s time for her to know.“ With those words he leaves the office and heads straight to hangar. He’s about to give orders to some agents to bring Nathan in. He’s been living in this lie for long enough, he plans to start anew and the first step is to give Audrey what she deserves – the truth.


	13. Chapter 13

„Audrey Nathan?“ Two men in black suits and black shades stop her in front of a little local supermarket. She’s holding a brown bag full of groceries in her arms. She was just about to put it to her blue car but those men crossed her path.

„Yes, do I know you?“ She kinda knows how to deal with those walking suits, she used to deal with one personally, after all. 

„We have orders to bring you to our facility, it’s for your own safety, ma’am.“ The taller one says and offers her some help with the bag. She frowns as the man’s taking her groceries from her.

„Orders? Who’s given you those orders?“

„Agent Coulson himself.“ The shorter one informs her and her eyes widen. She’s not sure if she’s heard it right but she doesn’t have time for any questions as one of those men puts a black bag over her head. Yeah, welcome to SHIELD.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

„So, what do you think? What’s better? Universal Studios or Disneyland?“ Fitz is having his regular session with agent May, again, he’s asking stupid question just to make her speak better.

„I-I d…d..don’t know. Don’t c…care.“

„Sure, sure. Well, I’d go to Disneyland if I weren’t SHIELD’s top scientist.“ He laughs a bit and agent May gives him one of her rare smiles.

„W-what…s..stops yo-you?“ He knows she’s teasing him, he’s never been teased by agent May and now he knows that he doesn’t want this to stop. He just realised how much he’d missed her. She’s slowly getting better and it makes him happy.

„Jemma doesn’t like any of that, you know, Disneyland, Universal Studios, Jurrasic Park…“

„S-she is s..s..smart.“ She points out and Fitz has to smile again. He wants to say something else but someone enters the lab. It’s Coulson, holding two mugs.

„Good morning, here’s your green tea aaand here’s your coffee.“ He hands them their mugs and both May and Fitz nod at Coulson, who’s carefully watching Melinda. He knows her status has improved a lot but he still feels like he should watch over her.

„T…thank you, Phil.“ He’s so proud of her, words can’t describe the way he feels every time she smiles and says something correctly. Fitz decides to leave them alone in the lab so they can talk…or not.

„Y-you d…d…didn’t come y-yesterday.“ She says, then slowly sips from her hot mug of her favorite green tea. He sits down next to her on a couch.

„I’m sorry about that. It’s been quite busy lately…“ He doesn’t want to start talking about Audrey and about his decision to tell her the truth about his death. 

„I..I understand.“

„Melinda?“

„Y-yes?“

„Say that again.“ He’s noticed she said it correctly and it acts like a huge energy boost to his system, Melinda is his new source of energy.

„I understand.“

„Oh my, you’re amazing.“ And he truly means it. She just smiles, letting him know she’s happy that he’s by her side. He reaches for her hand, slowly taking it to his bigger ones. He takes his time to just stare at her small fingers surrounded by his giant hands. He can’t believe something so gentle and small can be so lethal. There are days he’s glad she’s his friend…friend, that’s the problem – a part of him wants her to be more, he wants her to be his everything.

„I’ve been thinking…“ He starts, not looking at her face at all. There is something left of his earlier shyness, especially when it comes to Melinda.

„Y-yes?“ She asks, proving herself that she’s capable of a normal daily conversation with Phil, she has no idea what he wants to talk about. He opens his mouth to start his rant but Davies steps into the lab and interrupts him:

„Agent Coulson, the plane is here.“ Only Phil knows what Davies is talking about. He needs to go and face his responsibilities. 

„I’ll stop by later, okay?“ He asks Melinda and she nods.


	14. Chapter 14

He’s nervous. Of course he is, he’s about to reveal the truth about his death to someone who was a huge part of his life. He stops in front of an entrance to Mace’s (his) office. He can say she’s in there since her voice is filling the whole corridor.

„What kind of a sick game is this?! Where am I and who the hell are you?“ Coulson has to put a slight smile on his face, he’s always believed she wasn’t capable of such words and manners. She’s always been so nice, fragile and vulnerable. This is probably the reason why he was with her – there was something about her grace that always got him. He takes a deep breath and opens the door.

„I swear to God, if you don’t tell me wha-.“ She stops in the middle of her thought, noticing that someone has entered the office. She’s standing there like a statue, it seems like she’s afraid to move.

„What the…Phil…“ She says under her breath, not sure if it’s true. She can’t believe her eyes, there he is – standing in front of her, a person that looks exactly like her Phillip. She doesn’t move at all, still confused and scared. It takes her some time to process the situation, then, with tears in eyes, she’s running towards Phil. She hugs him, making sure this situation is real. He’s confused at first but then he lets in and welcomes her in his embrace.

„It’s me.“ He says, moving his hands up and down her back, making her feel better. He can feel her tears through a thin cotton of his shirt. She takes a step back so she can see him better, taking her time to examine his face. She slowly touches his cheek while she’s looking into his big blue eyes. Now he can see a major difference between Audrey and Melinda – Melinda wouldn’t allow herself to touch him like that so soon, she probably wouldn’t believe him at all but she’s a well trained agent so it wouldn’t be surprising.

„How is that even possible?“

„It’s…it’s a long story…“ He doesn’t know how to start.

„You were dead…“

„I was…but being a top SHIELD agent appeared to be quite convenient.“ He tries to ease the situation a little bit, he doesn’t want to think of what they were doing to him back then. He just wants her to be safe and aware of his presence in this world.

„You have changed.“ She’s still looking at his face with teary eyes. He hates to see women’s tears and it’s even worse to be the cause of them.

„Yeah, well, it’s been a while.“ Phil runs his hand through his hair and everyone in the office can say he’s nervous. She wants to say something else but the door opens and Daisy rushes in.

„Mace I need to talk to yo-.“ She realises Mace is not the only occupant of the room and she’s even more surprised to see who else is there. 

„Well, hello?“ Daisy comes closer to Audrey, she has no idea who’s this and why she’s crying but she can tell that the reason for that is AC.

„Oh, this is Daisy Johnson…Daisy, this is Audrey Nathan.“ Phil tries to make the most of Daisy’s sudden interruption. Daisy and Audrey shakes hands and Phil is aware of the uncertainty in Daisy’s expression.  
„So…agent Johnson, what can I do for you?“ Mace asks, trying to break the awkward silence.

„Oh, you think you could walk with me?“ Daisy wants to get out of the office since the atmosphere is not the best and she knows she won’t get any information from Coulson since he seems lost. 

„It’s not a problem at all, let’s go.“ They both disappear and when they are far enough, Daisy speaks up.

„So, I take it it’s a very awkward visit.“

„You have no idea.“

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

„Damn, I think you’re shooting even better than before.“ Mack encourages May as they’re both shooting. They stop and look at each other. May smiles and puts her gun down.

„I-I will g…go.“ Mack nods and gets back to shooting because he still doesn’t get how May can be so skilled at shooting even after all she’s been through.

May’s looking for Phil as she’s coming back to her bunk. She won’t admit that but she’s got used to spending time with him every day.

„Agent May, wait!“ Jemma notices May and runs after her with a thermometer. May rolls her eyes at Jemma’s exaggerated concern. She lets her do her job, though, she doesn’t want to waste any time with an unnecessary argument. 

„Wait a second, no threats?“ Jemma is surprised she doesn’t hear any complaints coming from agent May. May just shrugs and changes the topic.

„H-have y…you seen Phil?“ Normally, May would say Coulson but this is not the word she’s mastered with a little help of Phil. Jemma smiles and checks the thermometer.

„He’s having a visit now so maybe you can wait in my lab.“Clever, Jemma. May knows that her little offer is actually an invitation for more tests and medical nonsense but that’s not what has caught May’s attention.

„A…a visit?“

„Yes, I don’t know much but Daisy told me he’d been having someone around.“ It’s strange, Phil rarely talks with non-SHIELD people, unless he’s having a visit from someone who’s tied to SHIELD…or him.

„Th-thank you, J…J..Jemma but I w-will wait in…in…“ She suddenly can’t remember the word for the place she’s using for sleeping. Jemma waits a moment, letting her remember but when she sees she’s struggling way too much, she offers a little help.

„In your bunk?“

„Y-yes. T-that’s …th-the word.“

„Okay then, agent May, see you around.“ They share a smile before Melinda turns around and vanishes from Jemma’s sight.


	15. Chapter 15

„Damn, May! You managed to kick my ass again…seems like you got better.“ Daisy gets up from the mats and smiles at May. It’s funny how Daisy used to pretend to fall down to make May feel better about herself but now it’s the other way around – May really got better and Daisy doesn’t fall down on purpose anymore.

„T-thanks.“ May sips from her bottle and throws a towel at Daisy. During their breaks they usually discuss random stuff – May’s never been one to gossip or to talk about nonsense but it’s not easy to avoid such talks with Daisy. Actually, Daisy’s ranting about what happened to Piper while she was trying to learn Russian as they’re sitting on the only bench at their gym. May’s mind is far from this room, though. It takes only a few moments before Daisy senses that something is not right. She keeps talking, though, May will start talking when she’s ready.

„…and I honestly can’t believe that the guy didn’t kick her out of the class.“

„D-daisy…can I a….ask you something?“

„Sure, is everything okay?“Daisy is a bit concerned by May’s current behavior. Not that she’s not used to her complex self but there is something that has been bothering her and Daisy wants to help her as much as possible.

„I-is Phil…okay?“ Daisy doesn’t know what to say, honestly, she hasn’t seen him in the last two days so she probably doesn’t know more than May.

„I think so. You think there is something wrong with him?“ She asks, hoping may will tell her something more.

„A-actually…I-I haven’t s…s..seen him fo-for two d..days.“Daisy is carefully watching May as she gets up and heads to grab her own towel from the ground. 

„Well, I haven’t seen him as well, sooo…I guess he’s just busy with missions…“ It’s pretty clear that Daisy’s just trying to make her feel better and May lets her. With a slight smile May leaves the gym, heading to her bunk, the only place she feels safe at.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

„Here you go.“ Phil hands Audrey a glass of water. They’ve been in his bunk, talking about their lives, about his death and work.

„Thank you.“ She smiles up at him, making him feel weird. He almost forgot her smile and now it feels just weird.

„So, feeling better?“ Phil asks as he sits down on his bed next to her. She sips from her glass and rolls her eyes.

„You’re the one who died, Phil, I’m supposed to ask you if you feel better.“ Phil doesn’t say anything, he just shrugs his shoulders and takes a sip from his own glass. It feels weird to drink only water, he’s used to drinking scotch with Melinda and now he’s sitting on his bed with a glass full of water with lemon.

„Do you?“ Audrey breaks the silence and looks him in the eyes.

„Do I what?“

„Do you feel better?“ She asks him with a slight concern in her voice and he takes his time to answer. Does he feel better? He died, then were brought back to life and now he feels like he’s living someone else’s life. Is it supposed to feel like that? He doesn’t know but his mind wanders to a thing he knows he’s happy about – this tremendous improvement in Melinda’s health status. She’s physically fit and her speaking skill is getting better as well. Phil is sure that those moments are the ones he lives for and it answers Audrey’s question.

„Yes…I feel better.“

„Looks like there is something more to it.“ She says and he throws a confused look at her. Is he really like an open book?

„What do you mean?“

„Phil, I know you. We shared lives for more than five years so I know this face.“ They are looking into each other’s eyes and Phil suddenly feels guilty. Guilty because he died. Guilty because he died and left Audrey alone. Guilty because he decided to keep his new life a secret. Guilty because she still knows so much about him and there were times he couldn’t remember if her eyes were dark brown or light brown.

„It’s nothing. I’m just grateful, I guess, you know, I got a second chance.“ It’s true, he got a second chance and he’s chosen SHIELD all over again. He sometimes wonders how his life would look without SHIELD but it’s hard to imagine life without Melinda in it. 

„You should make the most of it.“ They are still looking into each other’s eyes. Phil is very observant so he can see how Audrey’s eyes trail down to his lips and back up to his eyes. Wait, is she about to kiss him? And does he want it? He swallows and she probably takes it as yes because she’s slowly moving closer. He doesn’t move at all but she’s still coming closer and closer and he’s lost. She’s just a few inches away as they are interrupted by Jemma’s voice.

„Uhm, sir?“ Audrey moves away and both of them look at Jemma. Phil is relieved, though.

„I’m sorry, I didn’t want to interrupt you but we haven’t seen you in a while and we’ve been worried.“ Jemma tries to hide the fact that she’s rather surprised by the scene she just witnessed. Coulson gets up and runs his human hand through his hair.

„No, no you didn’t interrupt anything, we were just talking. I’m fine, Jemma. See you at today’s briefing?“ He smiles at her and at the idea that his people are concerned about him. It feels nice to know that there is someone who’s missing you while you’re not around for only two days.

„Sure, see you later, sir.“ Jemma turns around and leaves them alone again, wondering what’s going to happen next.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

„Ughh they are both late…again.“ Mack is pacing up and down in their common area as they’re waiting for Mace and Coulson. It’s their briefing time and the most important people who are supposed to lead the briefing aren’t around.

„Keep calm, Big Guy, they’ll show up.“ Daisy sits down next to Elena on a huge black sofa. 

„Well, agent…I meant, director Coulson said he’d come.“ Jemma speaks up from her corner of the room. 

„You talked to him?“ Daisy asks and exchanges looks with Mack and Elena. Fitz, being all busy with his computer, seems to start listening to what others are talking about now.

„Yeah, well, I went to his bunk earlier today, you know, to see if he’s okay. He was there with miss Nathan so I assume he’s okay.“ Jemma expects them to look more relaxed but their confused faces tells her otherwise. 

„What?! Miss Nathan? Like Audrey Nathan, his ex-girlfriend?“ Mack asks, he seems more like angry than confused, though. Jemma still doesn’t know why.

„So she’s still around, huh?“ Daisy doesn’t sounds amused as well as Mack.

„Yes, it appears to be like that.“ Says Jemma.

„Oh boy.“ Mack sits down on a huge armchair that is situated right next to the black sofa. 

„So he’s spending time with his ex instead of being with May.“ Daisy states and looks at Fitz who pretends to be working on his computer.

„Maybe he just wants to be sure she’s fine.“ Jemma offers an opinion and others don’t seem to agree, especially Mack:

„And maybe she’s trying to get into his pants-.“

„Mack!“ Elena warns.

„What?“

„They are friends.“ 

„They used to be in a relationship.“ Mack doesn’t want to give up his opinion so easily.

„They got over it.“

„How can you possibly know that, Elena? You don’t know her.“

„I know him and that’s all I need to know, Turtleman. He loves agent May.“

„You can’t know that.“

„Everybody knows that.“ Fitz gets up and heads to grab his mug. The room is suddenly silent and no one really knows what to say next but lucky for them, they don’t have to think of that anymore as Mace and Coulson enters the room a few moments later.


	16. Chapter 16

„Do you think she’ll be happy?“ Daisy asks the rest of her team as they are approaching May’s bunk.

„She’ll love it!“

„Yeah, Jemma is right, it’s a perfect idea!“ They all have agreed on Daisy’s idea to let May join their briefings again. She’s still not able to complete missions but it wouldn’t hurt to hear her thoughts on their decisions. 

„I’m knocking, you’re speaking.“ Fitz knocks on May’s bunk and Daisy rolls eyes at Fitz childish behavior. 

„W-what do y…you need?“ May seems surprised to see them all there but a part of her is more than disappointed not to see Phil among them. She still doesn’t know what’s up with him and it makes her worried.

„We’ve been thinking…uhmm we want you to go with us.“ Daisy is sure that it wasn’t the best way to start because both Fitz and Mack makes those noises that are telling her to shup up.

„She wanted to say that we want you to join our briefings again.“ Fitz explains and May’s eyes widen.

„B-but I-I-I can’t g…go on missions yet.“ May is trying so hard not to sound sad but she fails miserably and others can see it on her.

„It’s a bad excuse, agent May! You are a valuable member of our team and we want you to work with us again, starting now.“ Jemma points at her watch and smiles at May, who’s just standing there in awe.

„W-what’s th…this mission a…about?“ All of them are happy that the old May is back because this is exactly the thing the old May would say.

„So then let me brief you about the briefing.“ Fitz starts talking about the mission and about problems SHIELD is facing these days.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

„Where the hell they are?“ Mace asks Coulson as they are sitting in a common room, waiting for the rest of the team to come back. Coulson doesn’t have time to react as they enter the room alongside with May. It takes his breath away, he hasn’t seen her in a while and she’s changed – in a good way, of course, she’s gained some weigth and she looks healthier, too.

„May…It’s so great to see you again.“ He comes closer and stops right in front of her, it’s almost like he’s forgotten that they are not alone in the room.

„G-good to s…see…y…you too.“ 

„You look great! I mean, you look better than you looked before, I mean, it was still great but you have improved, right?“ May rolls her eyes and he smiles awkwardly.

„Ehm-ehm, so, about the mission, we are supposed to…“Mace keeps talking about the missoin but the only thing Phil can focus on is Melinda. He hasn’t seen her in a while and it’s just now when he realises that he missed her terribly. 

After the briefing Phil offers to walk Melina wherever she wants to go to. She gladly accepts and they make their way out of the common area. 

„So, have have your training been going?“ Phil asks, interested in what she’s been doing.

„I-I kicked D…Daisy’s a…ass.“ She smirks and he laughs.

„Ha, I’m not even surprised.“

„Phil?“

„Yes?“

„A-are you…o…okay?“ Phi throws a surprised look in Melinda’s direction, not sure why she’d ask such question.

„I am, do I look like I’m not?“ He asks carefully. They walk through SHIELD’s corridors, none of them sure what’s their aim.

„Y-you …w….we h-haven’t t-talked.“ He knows right away what she means by that. A strong guilt washes over him as he realises why he hasn’t had time for Melinda in the last few days – Audrey. It’s not like he’s forgotten about Melinda, he’s just wanted to make sure that Audrey is ok. 

„I’m so sorry.“ That’s all he says because he knows Melinda is not the kind of person who begs for a long apologize, even though they tend to add „at length“ to every single fight they have. Melinda is just about to say something back as Audrey appears in front of them. 

„Phil, I’ve been looking for you. They told me you had a briefing so I thought I’d bring you something to eat. You must be hungry, ah it’s you…May, Melinda May, right?“ May is completely speechless so she just nods. Phil looks at Audrey and then at May, confused.

„Wait, you two know each other?“ Melinda knows where this talk is heading to so she’s thinking of possible ways to disappear.

„Oh yes, we’ve met a couple of times after you…you know…You used to talk about her a lot but I think we officialy met on your funeral.“ A very awkward silence follows Audrey’s comment about Phil’s funeral. Phil’s eyes find Melinda’s ones and in that brief moment he can say she knows Audrey is the reason why they haven’t talked in the last few days and he desperately wants to tell her it’s not like it seems to be but Melinda turns around and leaves.

„Is she alright?“ Audrey asks with a very confused expression. Phil doesn’t say anything at all, he’s standing there, looking after Melinda.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

May finds herself in a gym after her regular afternoon nap. She’s chosen weightlifting instead of boxing. The gym is empty and quiet so it’s a great time for some self-reflecting and sweating. 

„Damn.“ Daisy’s voice wakes Melinda up from her concentration sos he puts her weights down and looks in Daisy’s direction.

„I mean, you have really nice arms.“

„W-wanna j…join me?“ May smirks and Daisy grabs her jumping-rope instead.

„No, I’m not here to destroy myself…you on the other hand, well, it seems like it’s your today’s goal.“ 

„W-what?“

„You went jogging in the morning, did Tai Chi before breakfast, then you did some boxing and now you’re weightlifting…stop or we’ll have to start calling you Terminator.“ 

„I-it keeps m-me ….s…sane.“ She takes her weights back and continue in her training. She’s glad that Daisy is not talking. They share a nice time in a gym but there is something that is bothering May quite a bit.   
Surprisingly, it’s not Phil and Audrey but a very unpleasant feeling in her lungs. She knows the feeling and she knows well enough what can happen so she stops and takes a deep breath.

„You ok?“ Daisy stops jumping.

„Y-yeah…w-what t…time is it?“ Melinda is also a bit flushed and Daisy’s really worried about her but there is no good in pushing Melinda May, never.

„It’s almost 9pm.“

„I-I gotta g…go.“ May grabs her towel and water bottle but Daisy crosses her way out.

„Hey, Coulson’s usually finished with paperwork around nine, you sure you don’t want to stay?“Daisy studies May’s face, she feels like Coulson is the reason May’s not herself again so as a good agent Daisy is, she tries to wake some emotions inside her former SO.

„N-no.“

„I thought you’d want to see him, he’s not working tomorrow so maybe you both can have a day off and enjoy the day.“ She’s very careful with her words, she doesn’t want to cause any more harm but it seems like it’s already late.

„NO!“ May pushes Daisy away and leaves her alone in the gym. 

„May!“ Daisy tries to stop her with her voice but it has no use. May is stubborn and decided to make her way out of gym.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

May tries her best to avoid Phil for the rest of the day but when she decides to get something to eat, the only occupant in their common kitchen is him. He probably guessed she’d come for some food around this time, of course, he’s a strategist and planning is his second name. She wants to turn around the second she sees him but it’s too late because Phil knows she’s there.

„Melinda, what’s wrong? Talk to me, you’ve been avoiding me, I talked to Daisy.“ Ahh, of course he has talked to Daisy, this girl will be Melinda’s death.

„N-nothing.“

„I want to make things right again, okay? I know, I was an idiot and didn’t stop by but I had some reports to fill and-.“

„Oh, sure.“ She interrupts. She’s not stupid and knows that Phil spent the last few days with Audrey, though she’s too proud to admit that she’s actually pretty jealous.

„So is it about me and Audrey? If so I can assure you we’re not…you know.“

„I-I don’t care.“ He can say she’s angry, pretty angry, actually, and it makes him feel even worse. 

„Melinda, please, let me explain it.“

„S-save it.“

„I just wanted help her! Please, listen to me, Melinda, we have to talk it through so we can start anew.“ He catches her arm and she shakes him off.

„A-are you talking a-about you two o-or you a-and me?“ B-because I’m not s-sure anymore, Coulson!“ She calls him Coulson, it’s bad, really bad, for him.

„Melinda this is ridiculous. The relationship we had is in the past and I’m over it. It’s time to move on and try something new.“

„N-no, you d-deserve to be happy…w…with her.“

„What is that supposed to mean?“

„Be happy, Coulson! G-go and be with her but p-please, l-leave me alone and don-don’t talk to me.“ She has tears in her eyes and Phil wants to hug her and tell her she’s his happiness but he’s afarid she won’t let him. 

„I don’t want to be with her, Melinda! Don’t you get it?!“

„Y-you should be w-with her.“

„No way! Listen to me, you are the person I want to be with!“ He raises his voice to get the message to Melinda because she seems like she doesn’t understand him, which is quite surprising because she’s always been the one who knows him through and through.

„N-no, I’m not! I’m broken, don’t you see? I can’t go on missions, I can’t speak, I can’t cook for you and I definitely won’t bring you a piece of cake after a briefing…“

„Melinda…“

„…See? I’m not a girlfriend material, I’m not this lovely and cheerful person that she is, that men adore. I doubt I ever will be this kind of a person again…“

„Melinda, you’re speaking…“

„Of course I’m speaking, you dumbass! I’ve got enough of this bullshit, Coulson. It’s too much to see you being worried and sad because of me so go! Go and be happy with her, have kids you’ve always wanted, have the kind of a life you’ve always dreamed of!“ 

„You’re speaking like you used to!“ His eyes widen as he’s coming closer to her. She’s speaking again and he is lucky enough to witness it. He doesn’t even mind that it’s because of the fact that he’s been a terrible idiot, she’s speaking and it matters the most now.

„Oh my, God, you’re right, I’m not stuttering at all!“ A huge smile appears on her face, the one he hasn’t seen in a while. Phil is not afraid anymore so he goes straight to her for a giant hug that she accepts with the same enthusiasm. 

„I’m so sorry, Melinda, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you and I promise it won’t happen again.“ He whispers in her ear and she puts him closer, her earlier rage completely fogotten.

„You’ll be the death of me, Phil Coulson.“ He laughs and runs his hand through her hair. It has to be the best day of his life. He pulls away so he can see her face. 

„I hope not, otherwise I’d screw it up again.“

„I know you, Phil. I know that you’ll screw it up multiple times again.“ She’s right and he knows that, too. He always finds a way to get on Melinda May’s nerves but at least it’s not on purpose.

„Ready to talk about…you know…your little outburst?“ It takes him one look at Melinda to know that she’s definitely not ready.

„Don’t…just don’t start.“

„As you wish.“ He smiles down at her again. It’s quite an awkward position, they are still kind hugging – not-hugging and Phil has an urge to kiss her right there. He’s just about to joke about it when he sees a string of blood running down from Melinda’s nose.

„Oh my, God, Melinda…what the…?“ He wipes the blood away and she starts coughing.

„No,no,no,no! Not again, Melinda look at me! Come on, look at me! You’re alright, okay? You’ll be fine.“ He presses a button on Melinda’s bracelet, Simmons forced her to wear it after the last incident. It feels like hours and he starts getting more nervous as he’s standing there with bleeding and coughing Melinda and there is no evidence of medics or Simmons.

„What’s going on?!“ Fitz and Simmons rush into the kitchen, both dressed in funny pyjamas with atoms and other scientific objets he can’t name.

„It’s happening again, Jemma, do something, anything, please!“ He’s basically begging. Fitz and Jemma exchange one quick look, they know exactly what’s happening to her and it’s not good at all.


	17. Chapter 17

„Jemma, talk to me! What’s wrong with her? I deserve to know!“ Phil is desperate and he’s trying to get information on Melinda’s status from Jemma and Fitz. Fitz and Simmons look at each other as if they don’t know what to say. Simmons speaks up as first:

„Well, it’s…it’s complicated, sir, but we are both doing all we can to save her,“ Fitz throws an alarming look in Jemma’s direction and she knows right away that she probably said something she shouldn’t have.

„Save her? Save her from what?“

„Jemma wanted to say that we’re working really hard to solve all agent May’s problems.“ Daisy, Mack and Elena are sitting in the lab with them but they are not talking at all. They don’t have anything to say so they are just listening and thinking of possible ways on how to help Coulson get through this.

„What problems?! What the hell is wrong with her?! I swear, if you don’t tell me right now, I’ll-.“

„Coulson…“ Daisy doesn’t want him to finish the thought because she knows he’d regret it later.

„Please, just tell me.“ He’s basically begging them, Daisy is sure he’d beg on his knees if he wasn’t the director of SHIELD.

„Okay…well, agent May’s body wants back to the Framework, that’s something you already know….what you don’t know is that her shocks are caused by a…uhmm, let’s call it a bug, her shocks are caused by a bug in her brain that was activated in the Framework…“ Jemma takes a deep breath.

„Okay…“ Coulson is looking at her like she has his life in her hands and everyone else is as nervous as he is because there is an unsaid but that all of them noticed.

„…According to our calculations and some tests we ran with Fitz, the shocks will be more frequent until…“ Her eyes trail off as if she’s not strong enough to hold their gazes glued at her. 

„…until?“ Phil sounds hopeful.

„…until she dies.“ Fitz finishes the thought for Simmons it doesn’t have to be on her. It feels like the whole world stops for Coulson. Did Fitz really say ‚dies‘? He’s looking at Fitz but it seems like he forgot how to move and speak because he’s only starring, not sure how to react. 

„Is there anything we can do for her?“ Daisy asks as soon as she notices this (for Coulson) neverending moment of desperation.

„I’m afraid not…I mean, we have found a way but there is no way we can test it before putting agent May in it.“ Jemma still has hope in her voice and from Daisy’s experience it’s good. Good enough for them to know that there is a chance to save May from whatever is happening in her brain.

„What is it?“ Mack asks and moves his eyes to Coulson. Coulson is still not moving at all and it’s not a good sign.

„It’s basically our version of Framework…“ Fitz says and shows some graphs on a big screen.

„But less lethal, of course.“

„If it’s not lethal why can't we put May in it and see what happens?“ Daisy asks while she’s trying to understand the pictures on the screen. She curses herself for not taking science course when she could.

„Uhmm…her body was taken from the Framework once and it didn’t like it so we assume it’d be the same this time and considering agent May’s health status…it’s not a good idea, not yet.“ 

„But we can’t wait, can we?“ Elena speaks up from her place on the couch, as nervous as the rest of them. Fitz and Simmons exchange the same what-should-we-tell-them looks. 

„No, we need to figure it out, we need to find a way…we need to…“ Fitz is thinking out loud.

„Will she wake up?“ All eyes are now glued to Coulson that is making his way to the place from where he can see Melinda’s lying body through a special window.

„Yes, she will, like the last time but the shock may come sooner so we should be prepared for anything.“ Jemma joins Coulson by the window, looking at May.

„Jemma, you have to save her. I’ll give you anything you need, resourcers, money, whatever, just bring her back to me.“ The hardest things at facing Coulson in such situations are his teary eyes and desperate voice. 

„She’ll be alright, sir.“ 

„Thank you.“


	18. Chapter 18

She feels dizzy when she wakes up. Her head is killing her but there is a comfortable weight warming her right side. She moves her eyes down her body and sees Phil’s sleeping body – his head is resting on her belly and his human han dis holding onto the white blanket that is covering her own body. Even though it’s hard for her to move, she moves her right hand and runs it through his thinning hair. He moves a little, making a sound of approval. As she rests her hand on his neck, his eyes open to see what’s causing the great feeling.

„Hey there.“ He smiles up at her, unwilling to change his current position, but he knows it may not be the best position for Melinda so he lifts his head from her body, not breaking the eye contact between them.

„Hey.“

„How are you feeling?“ He knows it’s a stupid question to ask but he also needs to know if she’s fine.

„I’ve been better.“

„I’m so sorry, May.“ Phil takes her small hand to his bigger and warmer ones and kisses it.

„It’s not your fault.“

„Of course it is! If I wasn’t so overwhelmed by the Robo you, you wouldn’t have to stay in the Framework for so long and you wouldn’t have to go through all of this. I’m so sorry…I promise I will never be the same idiot again.“ He kisses her hand once again and then he looks down, trying to hide his teary eyes. She smirks, though.

„You can’t keep that promise, Phil, I know you and I know you’ll do something stupid again for sure.“ His eyes meet hers for a brief moment.

„I’ll try not to do anything stupid.“

„I’m sure you will.“ She smiles at him but he can’t force himself to do the same. He knows what’s wrong with her now and his brain is trying to come up with a way to help her. 

„Should I stay here for the night?“ He asks her with his typical puppy eyes.

„Why would you do that?“

„Just to make sure you’re okay.“

„Phil, I think there are people that are paid for that, you don’t have to stay.“ 

„But I want to.“

„You don’t want to, Phil, you just feel like it’s the right thing because you feel guilty.“ She’s teasing him a little bit, she knows he tends to get way too serious in situations like that and she doesn’t like it.

„No, that’s not true!“ He opposes and his voice is strong and firm.

„Don’t tell me you don’t feel bad about kissing a robot.“

„It’s not like that, Melinda, I lo-.“ Before he can finish his thought, Daisy runs into Melinda’s medical room.

„I’m sorry to interrupt but Coulson, we gotta go!“

„What’s happening?“ Phil gets up, letting go of May’s hand. She looks like she’d kill for a mission but her current health status doesn’t allow her to go with them.

„Watchdogs, come on, we don’t have much time.“

„We’ll finish that conversation later, I gotta go.“ He exchange a quick look with May and leaves her alone in the room. They have to finish the conversation later, he keeps telling himself in his mind.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (I'm so sorry for the delay, got finals to pass ehhhh :/..)

„So…how’s it going with your love triangle?“ Daisy asks Coulson in the Zephyr. They are the only ones sitting in cargo bay so Daisy feels like it’s the right time to have a little talk with Coulson. He seems surprised by her question.

„Excuse me?“

„You know, the thing going on with you, your ex girlfriend and May.“ It takes him a while to reply.

„There’s…there’s nothing going on, Daisy.“

„And it took you this long to say that? Come on, I know something’s going on and if not between you and An..Andr…what’s her name?...“

„Audrey.“

„Audrey, yeah, between you and Audrey then there must be something going on between you and May.“ Daisy waits for him to say something. She knows it must be hard for him to talk about his feelings and all. If she was in his place, she wouldn’t be so chatty either.

„Why would you say that?“

„Well, I have eyes, Coulson. I can see the looks you’re throwing in May’s direction. But I can also see the way Audrey looks at you so I just…I know it’s none of my business but uhmm…you should make it clear for them and for you.“ It’s been a while since Phil saw Daisy so insecure. He must admit that it feels weird to be the one getting advice on his romantic life but Daisy just wants to help.

„What do you mean by that?“

„I don’t want you to hurt May because of some still existing feelings for your ex. I know you probably missed her, she’s a great junction to your past but it’s not fair for May in any way. She deserves better than that. If I can be completely honest with you, I’d be happier if you hurt Audrey rather than May…she’s been through so much…she just…she deserves better.“ Daisy’s voice is very emotional and she avoids Coulson’s gaze because of her teary eyes. Coulson is pretty sure she’s about to start crying because of the sound in her voice and he’s not so far from teary eyes as well. The fact that Daisy cares for May that much melts his heart.

„She deserves the best, Daisy, the very best.“ He says sincerely and looks down at his hands.

„Yes, she does so please…be fair.“

„I won’t hurt her…I will never hurt her, Daisy, I care about her so much.“

„So then tell her. I know she’s not exactly a material for this kind of talk but she should know.“ Coulson looks at her and makes a funny expression.

„You know, I was just about to tell her when you run into her lab. You’re kinda the reason why she doesn’t know yet.“ 

„Are you kidding me?! It’s not my fault, just so you know! It’s on Watchdogs!“ She crosses her arms and pretends to be touched by his comment. He laughs a little when he’s getting up.

„Come on, we have work to do.“

„YOU have work to do when we come back, AC.“

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

May’s relaxing in her medical lab and it’s slowly getting on her nerves. She’s not used to relaxing and doing nothing, she’s the one who gets the work done but since she doesn’t have any kind of work to do these days, the only thing left for her is to lie down and wait for her health to improve so she can do Tai Chi again. She’s just about to grab the book on dragons that Fitz’s lent her as the door to her lab slowly opens.

„May I come in?“ It’s Audrey, dressed in a red summer dress with some flowers in her hands. Of course, she’s always been so sweet and bringing flowers is something a person like her would do in such situation. May only nods, she doesn’t feel like talking with anyone, especially not with a woman that’s trying to get back to Phil’s life.

„Those are for you, roses, I remember Phil telling me about your favorite flowers so here you go.“ Melinda takes the flowers from Audrey and puts almost unvisible smile on her face. It means thank you and she hopes Audrey gets it.

„I am very sorry for bringing up Phil’s funeral. I assume that was the reason why you walked away that day. I didn’t mean to bring any kind of unpleasant memories back to you, it was a hard time for me, too, but you know that…“

„Yes, it wasn’t the best thing to talk about, especially not in front of him.“ May tries so hard not to sound irritated. 

„What do you mean?“

„It’s not exactly his favorite thing to talk about, given the circumstances of his resurrection.“ Audrey’s eyes widen at Melinda’s words but she doesn’t ask anything else, she knows it’s probably clasiffied anyway.

„You know him so well.“ Audrey simply states and Melinda nods.

„I’m his…I WAS his partner in the field. I’m supposed to know a lot about him.“ May says without any extra emotions.

„I didn’t mean it like that…you know him well as a person. I know you were close.“ It suprises Melinda a little bit, she didn’t expect her to say something like that. It’s almost like Audrey’s sure there was something between her and Coulson.

„No, we weren’t…we didn’t really…you know.“

„I know. You were his best friend, one of the most important people in his life. He used to talk about you a lot, actually. I know what your favorite flower is, I know your favorite meal, your favorite color, your favorite book…it was almost impossible for him to stop talking about you.“ Melinda feel a wave of warmth going down her spine, so Phil was thinking about her even back then.

„You know, he never loved me.“ Audrey says out of nowhere. Melinda swallows hard and looks up at Audrey, looking for a further explanation. She almost feels bad.

„I mean, there were some feelings but he never loved me in a way he should have. There was only one person that was on his mind all the time…and it wasn’t me.“ Audrey talks about that like it’s nothing and Melinda really wants to run away right now, she doesn’t like such talks and she feels sorry for Audrey.

„The person he has always loved is you, Melinda…I know I should be jealous and hate you for that but I can’t…I can’t because I know what kind of an amazing person you are, I know what you’re willing to do and sacrifice for him and I just can’t hate such person. I…I know you are the person that makes him happy and that’s what I want for him. He deserves a second chance in this life with you, he can finally get what he always wanted so please, let him love you.“ It takes Melinda’s breath away, she doesn’t know what to say and how to react. She’s not sure if she’s more surprised because of the fact that she has been on Phil’s mind all the time or because of Audrey’s sincere wish.

„I-I don’t really know what to say.“

„It’s okay, I know you’re not that talkative. I just want you to know that I won’t be in your way. Actually, I’ve moved on with my life, found a new job, new friends…I’m just happy I was able to see him again. He really is a sweet person but I guess you already know that. I should probably go, the British girl isn’t thrilled with my visit so I hope to see you around. Get well soon, Melinda.“ And with those words Audrey leaves Melinda alone in the lab again.


	20. Chapter 20

„So how’s she feeling?“ Coulson just arrived to the base and now he finds himself in Simmons’s lab, waiting for her to feed him on Melinda’s status.

„Why don’t you go and ask her yourself, AC?“ Daisy sneaks into the lab as well.

„I will, I just want to know if she’s alright so Simmons, how’s she feeling?“ Jemam turns around and meet his eyes. He can see that something’s not right but Simmons’s had this look on her face since Melinda’s last shock so he’s going to ignore it and listen to what she has to say on Melinda’s health.

„She’s okay, I mean, her status hasn’t changed…it’s…it’s still the same so there is still the same number of things that can go wrong BUT I think we’ve found a way to reverse the effect of the Framework.“ Jemma’s expression didn’t change, though. It still seems hopeless and he badly wants her words to be true.

„Tell me more.“

„We still need to make new scans of her brain and redesign the Framework but now we know that there is a way. We can save her, director.“ Jemma smiles and it somehow makes him feel better. He knows this is not a sprint, it’s more like a marathon but there’s still hope and he’s willing to do anything in this world to help Melinda to get on her feet again.

„Oh you guys are back.“ Fitz enters the lab with a tablet in his hands. 

„Jemma, I did the new scans we were talking about earlier today.“

„And?“

„Agent May didn’t like it at all but she let me test her eventually.“ Coulson and Daisy now both feel like they should leave because the two scientists don’t seem to pay attention to their presence in any way.

„We should probably print it.“

„Great idea.“

„Okay, we’re going to see May, is that alright?“ Daisy asks but she gets no response. 

„We do have a lot of printed material, it’s getting chaotic.“ Fitz is just complaining about the lack of space on Jemma’s desk.

„I know, maybe we should build a new desk.“ Jemma points out and moves closer to Fitz so she can see the mess from his perspective.

„Or you guys can buy one.“ Daiys speaks up again and Coulson feels an urge to burst into laughter. There is no way they can get over this adorable behavior of their scientists.

„Ahh you guys are still here. Is there anything we can do for you, sir? Daisy?“ 

„Yeah, I asked you if it was okay to see May about two minutes ago but you didn’t listen.“

„Of course you can go to see Agent May, she shouldn’t be alone.“ Fitz gently smiles and then turns around so he can remove the mess from the table.

Daisy and Coulson leave the lab and head straight to May’s lab. Right in front of the door Coulson stops but Daisy continues in her way. He’s not sure if he should stop her but she’s probably giving him some space and time for the talk he wants to have with May. He’s grateful for that because he feels like it’s the right time. He slowly opens the door and sneaks in. 

She’s looking out of the window, Coulson can tell that she’s thinking about something because he knows this expression pretty well. Her eyes are still focused on the window and his heart skips a beat – he can’t believe that someone can be still so beautiful after this kind of medical treatment.

„Are you just going to stare at me or are you actually coming in?“ She wakes him up from his own thoughts, now his crystal-clear blue eyes meet her chocolate ones. 

„May I sit down?“

„You never ask.“ She says with narrowed eyes. He chuckles and runs his hand through his hair.

„Yeah, well, I am asking now…sooo may I?“ She nods and he moves the chair closer to Melinda’s bed.

„I need to ask you something.“ Melinda starts a conversation in a way that is not so common for her. He blinks a couple of times as a hundred of possible scenarios are running in his head.

„Okay?...“

„Did you love Audrey?“ He quickly moves his eyes to a little table that is situated right next to Melinda’s bed. Flowers…Audrey was there.


	21. Chapter 21

They are looking into each other’s eyes and Phil’s nervously tapping with his left foot. There are fresh roses on the table so it’s clear that Audrey visited Melinda earlier today. 

„Why are you asking such question?“ He narrows his eyes and briefly looks away. He knows he just did the worst thing he possibly could because Melinda knows him way too much not to notice his nervousness.

„Don’t answer my question with another question. It’s a simple one, did you love Audrey or not?“ Melinda herself is not sure why she’s asking. It’s probably in her nature – she’s used to looking out for other people and watching Audrey being sad because of her one-sided love for Phil was enough to make Melinda ask such questions. She wants to make it clear, for Audrey and for herself as well. Phil swallows and looks down, not sure what to say.

„But why would you ask? What is it that Audrey told you?“

„Don’t ask, Phil, just answer.“

„But it’s not a fair question!“

„It’s an easy question. It requires just yes or no. So tell me, yes or no?“

„But why do you want to know that so badly? It’s not important, not now.“ He’s trying to turn the conversation over so he doesn’t have to give her the answer. It’s not because Phil would be one to hide things from Melinda, it’s because he is not sure about the answer at all. 

„Phil, just say yes or no, it’s not a big deal.“ She tries to make him cooperate, she wants to know the answer so they can move on. 

„It is a big deal for me! I don’t want to talk about my past relationships, not now that I’m trying to…you know…never mind.“ He crosses his arms on his chest, probably in order to „protect“ himself from Melinda’s questions.

„I don’t want you to talk about it, I want just a simple answer.“

„How would you feel if I asked you about Andrew, huh?“ He knows that the best defense is offense – he still remembers this from the Academy. His question is followed by a very unpleasant silence and Phil almost regrets saying name of Melinda’s ex husband.

„Don’t start with this.“

„Why not? Did you love him, Melinda?“

„I said don’t!“

„You’re forcing me to answer a question that you yourself don’t know an answer to.“

„I’m not forcing you. If I forced you, you’d be screaming for help.“

„Oh sure, because you’re a freaking ninja!“ This little fight is followed by unpleasant silence again. It takes Phil about thirty seconds to speak up again.

„Uhhh…okay, let’s just…forget this thing about our ex relationships and move on. It’s not important, anyway. It doesn’t change anything on what I feel now.“

„Phil, she thinks you didn’t love her. How about that? What if she asked you this question?“ Phil is not sure if he’s more surprised of Melinda’s honesty or the fact that Audrey had doubts about their relationship.  
„It’s...just…look, I-I don’t know, ok? I don’t know what I’d say. There…there were some feelings involved, that’s for sure. We were together for 5 years so there had to be something but it just…it wasn’t…it…ughhh…I don’t know, she was very sweet and lovely and always so positive but while she was living in a fairy tale, I was saving this world and dealing with terrible things and it just didn’t work well together, you know? We are complete opposites and…and to answer your question, I can’t say I didn’t love her…but I can’t say I did either, that’s about it.“ Now he is finally able to maintain eye contact with her. He came out with everything he had and he must admit that it feels good to say that out loud.

„I didn’t love him.“ Is all that Melinda says. It makes him blink a couple of times because he didn’t expect her to be so straightforward. And he also didn’t expect this kind of answer.

„Huh?“

„Andrew…I…I didn’t love him. I always tried to convince myself that there were feelings but you just can’t fool yourself forever. I don’t even know why I married him.“

„It’s not your fault. Sometimes we do things that don’t fit with our desires.“ They are silent for a couple of moments but it’s a comfortable kind of silence, the one that makes you think and re-think.

„You know what?...I think I didn’t love Audrey, either. Now that I’m thinking about it, I was fooling myself as well. I was trying to love her, I was trying so hard because I felt like it was the right thing to do because she had those feelings for me.“

„Seems like we are both huge idiots.“ Phil laughs at Melinda’s comment. It’s true, they are both idiots because they put their real feelings aside.

„Yeah, but to be honest, the only girl I was really interested in was already taken in the beginning so there wasn’t much to do about it, really.“ Her smile grows wider.

„Ahh seriously? Tell me about it.“

„I can tell you about it over a dinner.“ He smiles and waits for Melinda’s reaction. He has never been an expert at asking women out but it comes out naturally when it comes to Melinda. It feels right.

„Ohh, are you asking me out?“

„So, Italian or Japanese? I can cook for you and bring it down here, I’m sure Simmons won’t mind.“

„Phil!“  
„Yes…yes, I’m asking you out, is that alright?“ He can’t shake off that stupid smile on his face as he’s looking at Melinda.

„Japanese sounds great, I hate spaghetti.“

„But spaghetti is not the only French meal I can make.“ Phil sounds almost offended.

„You got the message, right?“

„Sure…so Japanese then.“ They exchange another rare smile and drift into another comfortable silence.


	22. Chapter 22

„What’s going on? Why does Mace want to see us?“ Phil asks as he steps into his office. Daisy is already there.

„There might be a reason or two but now forget about that and tell me how did it go?“ Daisy’s eyes are full of anticipation and excitement. It’s not like he proposed to Melinda but it still somehow makes Daisy happy.

„I asked her out.“

„What?! So you didn’t tell her.“ She states the obvious and slowly shakes her head so Coulson can see the disappointment.

„Not yet, I’ll tell her over our dinner.“ Daisy wants to say something, probably ask him about the food, but Coulson is faster:

„So…do we wait for anybody else except Mace?“

„Ehmm, I don’t think so.“

„I’m so glad you guys are here.“ Mace’s here just in time, Coulson thinks and they move closer to his desk.

„So what’s up?“ Mace hands Phil a tablet.

„Radcliffe is ready to be interrogated…his health status is good enough to be put under some stress during the interrogation.“ After hearing Mace’s words, Phil frozes. He knows what it means for him – he’ll finally get face to face with a man that hurt Melinda.

„Prepare him. I want to interrogate him right now.“ Phil’s voice is emotionless.

„I don’t think that’s the best idea, Coulson. Mack can do that, too.“ It seems like Mace is ready to have this little argument with Phil but it’s never good to get between Coulson and a thing Coulson wants.  
„No. I’ll do that. Now get him ready.“

„Or maybe I can help.“ Daisy offers her help because she knows that this might end up pretty bad for Radcliffe.

„No, agent Johnson. You are the one who put him into critical condition, after all, so we already know that you can’t control your anger while being in the same room with this guy.“ Mace points out and Coulson moves to a mic that is on his desk.

„Mack, could you please prepare room number 47 for interrogation? Thank you.“ Phil is not one to wait around, once he’s decided to do something, he goes straight to the nitty-gritty. Mace and Daisy exchanges alarmed looks, this is going to be bad, very bad.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

He’s just on his way to the room 47 when he passes by Melinda’s room. He decides to say hi, he doesn’t want her to feel abandoned again. He expects her to be reading or watching one of those stupid TV shows that Daisy got her but she’s sleeping instead. He wonders if he should go but the urge to be close to her is too strong. He quietly moves closer to her bed. She would wake up right away in any other situation because it’s Melinda May and she’s always ready, even in her sleep. But the Melinda that is sleeping now…it’s a very tired and weak Melinda. It breaks his heart to see her like that, she’s lost some weight, too, he can tell. He gently puts his hand on her smaller one and squeezes. 

„You’ll be alright, I promise.“ Now that he’s even motivated to give Radcliff exactly what he deserves, he leaves her to her sleep and goes to the room 47.

„Director.“ Davies greets Coulson as he steps out of the corner. Even though Mace is the face of SHIELD, no one calls him „director“ anymore. Phil’s the one who’s calling the shots again.

„Is he ready?“ He looks at him through the glass that is there. He’s aware that Radcliffe can’t see him. 

„Yes, sir.“

„Great, now excuse me.“ He goes straight to the door, he doesn’t stop. Daisy, Mace and Mack are ready to watch them throught the glass. Phil’s kinda surprised that Fitz and Simmons aren’t down there as well but they are probably working on the new version of Framework that can save May’s life. He hopes so.

„Isn’t it agent Coulson himself?“ Radcliffe puts one of his sly smiles on. It takes only a few seconds and Phil already feels a strong urge to punch him hard with his robotic hand.

„It’s director.“

„Ahh my apologies. Care to explain me why I’m here?“

„Don’t play this game, Radcliffe. You know pretty well why you’re in this room…and…in this condition.“ The image of Daisy quaking his life out of him runs through his mind and he smiles. That’s what he deserves.

„I didn’t do anything wrong, I did it all for the sake of science. Every scientist has to experiment and face hard sacrifices, it’s in our nature.“

„You’re not a scientist, you’re a maniac!“

„Well, it’s a harsh word to say, really.“ 

„I think the word suits you. Now, tell me what was your plan with the Framework and where are you hiding your research?“ Phil knows he won’t give him a straight answer but he must begin somehow.

„Hahah this won’t work, I won’t tell you anything.“ Radcliffe crosses his arms on his chest and looks away.

„Oh yes, you will.“ Phil smiles because he has a secret „weapon“ against Radcliffe and he can’t wait to use it.

„Don’t be ridiculous. I don’t have anything to lose so why you think I’ll give you answers?“ Phil was waiting for those words to be said. He leans closer to Radcliffe and gives him one of his cold looks.

„Because there is still one person you care about, one person that is still in the Framework.“ Radcliffe’s eyes widen at Coulson’s words.

„You’re not going to touch Agnes!“

„I’m not if you give me what I want.“ This is the part Phil loves the most about interrogations, the moment when you have the person in your power.

„You’re not telling the truth, there is no way you could find her body so I’m not going to tell you a single thing!“ Radcliffe’s getting more and more nervous because the truth is that he’s not really sure if Coulson has Agnes or not.

„It wasn’t difficult to find her. We’re still wondering, should we disconnect her from the Framework or not?“ Radcliffe gets up and points a finger at Phil:

„Don’t you dare to touch her, you bastard-.“ Phil gets up as well and grabs his neck with his robotic hand. When Radcliffe starts to struggle with his breathing, Coulson whispers:

„Oh yeah, what you gonna do? Huh? I’ll make sure she suffers and I will fucking enjoy it.“ Daisy, Mace and Mack are in the room in a second, all of them surprised by Coulson’s spontaneous action.

„Coulson, stop!“ Daisy raises her voice a bit so the message gets to Coulson that is still holding Radcliffe basically in the air.

„Get out.“ Phil says and squeezes his robotic hand a bit, making Radcliffe fight for breath.

„Let him go!“

„I said GET OUT!“ This is the first time they see Coulson like that. His cold voice matches his cold look. He finally gets Radcliffe down and moves him back to his seat. Mace and Mack leave the room but Daisy’s still standing in the middle. Coulson frowns and Daisy gets it, she gives him one last disappointed look and leaves as well.

„Aghh, Jesus Christ, you are a monster.“ Radcliffe manages to say and Coulson hits the desk with his human hand.

„Shut up!“

„Let’s just…keep it between us…between me and SHIELD, I don’t want any harm for the innocent and Agnes is-.“ He doesn’t have time to finish the though because Coulson gets up again and this time he’s grabing Radcliffe by his collar and moves him closer to his face.

„The innocent? The INNOCENT?! You wanna talk about the innocent you son of a bitch?! So let me show you what you did to an innocent person!“ Coulson lets him sit down again and reaches for a folder on the desk. He takes a few photos and grabs Radcliffe by the collar again, this time he slams his head against the metal desk, a few inches from the photos.

„So then have a look! Look what you did to an innocent person!“

„Please…ughh…h-how can I have a look if you keep smashing my head against this bloody desk!“ Phil lets him go now, moving the pictures closer so he can look at them.

„Waht do you see?! This is agent May…THIS…“ Phil points at an older picture of her.

„…is agent May before you got her to the Framework…and THIS…“ He points at a couple of other pictures that are on the desk.

„…is agent May after we found her in that old warehouse. Do you see a difference?“ Radcliffe doesn’t say anything, he’s just staring at a picture of a very skinny and weak May. Phil slams his head against the desk one more time before he asks him again:

„DO YOU SEE A FREAKING DIFFERENCE?! I think so! This is what you did to the innocent so don’t you dare to think you did it for the sake of science!“

„I-I didn’t really…I h-had no idea…“ Radcliffe struggles with words and Phil’s losing his temper again.

„This is what happens to the innocent!“

„I-I just wanted to help and-.“

„Help?! What the hell did you just say?! Help? You? With this? You piece of…“ Coulson punches him in the face…

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

„How’s it going?“ Mack asks Daisy that is still glued to the window, watching Coulson and Radcliffe.

„Still the same, he just punched him again. We should stop him.“

„I don’t think that’s the best idea…“

„Mack is right…Coulson is out of his mind, he needs this.“ Mace joins them by the window. Coulson suddenly opens the door, stretching his human hand. None of them is ready to speak just yet, not even Daisy.

„Here…“ Coulson hands Mace a piece of paper.

„What is it?“

„It’s the location of the place where he has his research. I want a team on this right now, it may help us solve Melinda’s problem.“ His voice is still cold and distant. 

„Coulson.“ Daisy calls after him as he’s about to leave the room. He doesn’t turn around, though.

„Don’t…just don’t start, Daisy.“

„Are you feeling any better?“ It’s a simple question.

„Honestly…yes.“

„Good, I felt better, too.“


	23. Chapter 23

„So, everything should be ready. Uhmmm what else, what else…yes! Glasses.“ Phil’s getting everything ready and Melinda’s watching him from her own comfortable bed. Simmons and Fitz allowed her to move to her bunk for this night to make it nicer for them both. 

„Phil, I’m hungry, what is taking you so long?“

„I’m coming, no worries.“ He puts a mug of tea in front of her and sits down on her bed as well. This is a very strange position for having a dinner but as far as Melinda is comfortable, he doesn’t mind.

„What are you drinking?“ She asks confused as she doesn’t spot a glass of scotch or a bottle of beer.

„Water, water with lemon.“ He smiles and sips from his own mug. She frowns at his response.

„Why?“

„Uhm, you can’t drink alcohol so I thought it’d be better to get a glass of something else instead.“ She just shakes her head and reaches for something in her nightstand. In a moment there is a half-full bottle of scotch in front of Phil.

„Your favorite.“

„Damn, Melinda, the year…it’s…great…but I’ll stick to water for tonight.“ He smiles again and places the bottle away.

„You don’t have to do that, you know.“

„I know but that’s what I want.“ They exchange a knowing look and Melinda smirks. God, how much he missed her smirk.

„Right now I want to eat so what’s for dinner, chef?“

„Ooooh, here you go…sushi, my lady.“ Melinda doesn’t hesitate for a moment and gets the first piece into her mouth, with chopsticks, of course. Phil follows her move. He’s pleased to see Melinda eating his food so eagerly. The way her eyes close when she takes a bite or the way she moves strings of her hair away so it doesn’t get into her food. 

„You should eat too, or there won’t be anything left for you.“ She teases him as she eats another piece. He just smiles and wets his lips.

„It’s all yours…I mean, if you want.“

„So, how are the missions going?“ She changes topic and goes to the least comfortable one for Phil. He still sees Racliffe’s bloody face.

„Ehm, it’s okay…nothing special, really. Just regular missions with regular outcomes. Oh well, there is actually something that might make you happy…“

„Yes?“

„We’ve found Radcliffe’s research…there should be a team right now, picking it up. It can help Simmons and Fitz to solve all your problems.“ He can’t fight the smile that is forming on his face. Just the thought of this possibility is enough for him to be happy. Melinda doesn’t seem to share his ethusiasm.

„Don’t be hopeful, Phil…“

„I’m not, I’m realistic, Melinda. You’re going to be alright and then I’m taking you to the nice place as I promised.“ He reaches for her hand and gently touches her skin.

„What place?“ She asks and he realises that he said more than he had wanted to. Of course she doesn’t know, she was unconscious after all. 

„It was…just a result of our little talks while you were unconscious, I mean, my little talks to you, forget it.“ He lets go of her hand and runs his human hand through his hair, yes, he’s nervous.

„Phil, it’s okay. I would talk to you, too, if you were in that situation.“

„God, seriously, we are idiots. Instead of having those talks face to face, we deal with them while the other one is asleep or unconscious.“ Phil laughs and so does Melinda. 

„Maybe we should have one now.“ Melinda says and smiles gently. Phil swallows and nods.

„Yes, I think so.“ They are looking into each other’s eyes, not saying anything.

„So…is there anything you want to tell me? Because there is something I’d like to tell you.“ Melinda begins and gives him a moment to think. 

„Yes…yes, there is something. Listen, we’ve been through so much pain, damn, we both died and came back to live and I’d like to think it was for a reason. Maybe…just maybe we are destined to be, you know, here…together, I mean. I just…damn, I had the whole speech ready but…I just…want you to know how I feel about this whole thing, I mean about us…you…“ Melinda rolls her eyes and shoots him her „seriously, Phil?“ look. He stops talking immediately.

„Phil…just tell me about your feelings.“ He reaches for her hand and runs his thumb over her soft skin.

„I think…no…I know that you are very important to me. You’ve always been more than just my friend, Melinda, but now you’re even more than that. I want…I want to try a thing we both were avoiding for years because of SHIELD…I...I’ve always had feelings for you and I wasn‘t able to name it but now I know, I’m sure it’s love…I…I love you, Melinda, and I mean it. It’s more than love, it’s…I want you to be my everything.“ If Melinda didn’t know him, she’d say there are tears in his eyes. There may be some tears but Melinda finds it adorable, men that cry have always been her weakness. She looks at their entwined hands and smiles.

„Why has it taken us so long?“

„Does it mean yes?“ He looks at her with his puppy eyes that are hard to resist. She rolls her eyes again and squeezes his hand.

„What do you think?“

„I think that I should work on my speeches.“

„That’s something we both can agree on.“ He laughs, partly because of their little banter and partly because it’s finally said out loud, he finally admited his feelings for this amazing woman and he feels like everything’s possible.

„So, just to make it clear, are we a couple?“ He asks and she can’t fight the urge to roll her eyes again. He’s such a dork.

„I think we are too old to be a couple. I guess we are more like…“ She thinks of possible names of what they actually are and Phil offers a name himself:

„Soulmates?“ She looks surprised but she nods.

„Yes, soulmates.“ He moves closer to her so his next step goes smoothly. 

„There is something I’ve been waiting for…“ He quickly looks at her lips and then he starts leaning closer. He hopes that’s what she wants as well, he’s not sure what he’d do if she pushed him away. They are only inches apart when someone knocks on Melinda’s door. They both laugh and Phil leans his head down so their foreheads are touching.

„I guess it has to wait.“ Phil gets up with those words, not as annoyed as he thought he’d be. Good things take time, after all.

„Ah Simmons, what do you need?“

„I’m so sorry to interrupt, sir, but Radcliffe’s research just arrived and the team is not familiar with the fact that I have access to it so they need your permission. Could you please go with me?“ Phil turns around to see Melinda’s encouraging smile, yeah, he should go. He’s doing this for her.

„I’ll come back.“


	24. Chapter 24

„So where’s the problem? Could you please give agent Simmons the research?“ Phil is standing in front of a team full of armed men, waiting for his orders.

„Yes, sir.“ They finally open the van and let Simmons and her people take the things out. 

„Why didn’t you want to give it to Simmons? You know she’s an agent so what’s the deal?“ Coulson is curious and he wants to know why his night with Melinda was interrupted.

„We answer only to you, sir.“ 

„Next time, agent Simmons here has my permission to operate with anything we find, is that clear?“

„Yes, sir.“

„Perfect, now if you excuse me, I have a dinner to finish.“ Phil smiles for himself because he knows what exactly he has to finish. His happiness doesn’t last for a long time as Daisy and Mack come to the hangar. 

„Dinner must wait, Coulson, we gotta go.“ Diasy gives him a tablet and Mack heads to their plane to make things ready.

„What’s going on?“

„It’s a long story but Mace got into a little fight with Talbot and now he doesn’t want to let his intel on Watchdogs out until you come around and talk to him personally. I know you have other things to do now but we really need the intel.“ Phil sighs and gives Daisy the tablet back. It seems like there won’t be a perfect timing for being with Melinda but he’s certain that he’ll take a few weeks off someday and enjoy it with Melinda by his side.

„Okay, let’s go. Uhm, Simmons?“

„Yes, sir?“

„Could you please stop by Melinda’s bunk and tell her we’re having a mission? I don’t want her to wait for me.“ Simmons smiles and nods. She notes to herself that it’s the first thing she’ll do after giving the research to Fitz that is already pretty impatient.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

„Okay, guys, put those folders on the desk in the corner and I’ll take care of those hard drives.“ Simmons and a group of people with boxes in their hands come to Fitz and Simmons‘ lab. Fitz’s been just working on some new designs of the new Framework.

„Simmons?“

„It’s the research, I had a quick look at those folders and it’s unbelievable, Fitz. There are even papers on the Darkhold.“

„Oh my, God, Simmons. Let’s get to work, we need to find out what we are missing, we need to start going throught that right now. Come on, I’ll look into the hard drives and you can start with the folders.“ He gently moves her out of his way as he’s reaching for the first hard drive. Simmons smiles at him.

„I’ll be back in a moment, I need to check on agent May.“ Fitz wants to protest but he knows it’s important to make sure she’s alright. He just nods and connects the hard drive with his computer.

Simmons gently knocks on May’s door. She’s surprised to see her on her feet, opening the door for her.

„Oh my, agent May, you are not supposed to be out of bed! Come on, let’s get you back. Aren’t you hurt or something? Don’t you need anything? Water? Pain killers?“ Melinda just rolls her eyes at Jemma’s overacting and slowly follows Jemma so she can lay down.

„I’m okay, Simmons. I just wanted to pee, since when it’s a sin?“

„It’s not funny, agent May. Now please, get to the bed and relax.“ Jemma carefully prepares May’s pillow and she also makes sure she has some water nearby.

„I think it’s okay, Simmons. Coulson can do that later.“

„Ahh yes, director Coulson has a mission and he asked me to tell you that. He’s very sorry he won’t be able to make it back tonight.“ Jemma moves away so May can lay down. She leans against the wall, though. Jemma frowns and puts his hand on May’s shoulder.

„Is everything okay? Agent May, talk to me.“

„J-Jemma…I think I am having the shock again…“ Jemma’s eyes widen and she turns agent May’s head around so she can see her eyes.

„Look at me agent May…where does it hurt?“

„E-everywhere, it’s…ahhhg.“ May falls down and holds her head. Jemma takes her mobile phone as she’s bending down to give May the first aid.

„Fitz?! Call the medics and come to agent May’s bunk immediately! She collapsed! Take the green serum and bring it here!“ Simmons throws the phone away and finally fully focuses on May.

„Okay agent May, do you hear me?“

„Ya—yeah.“

„Great, just stay focused, okay? Look at me!“ Jemma’s trying so hard to keep her awake. She knows that if May faints now, her body will be closer to giving up on this reality and that’s something Jemma won’t allow to happen!

„Agent May! Fight, you have to fight it! Do you listen to me, agent May? Stay awake, don’t give up! Do it for us, do it for director Coulson! Just listen to my voice and don’t go anywhere!“ Jemma sounds almost hysterically as she’s talking to May.

„I want…“

„What? Whatever, agent May, just stay awake, ok?!“

„I w-want to fight.“

„Yes! YES! You can fight it, you are Melinda May! I know you want to fight, I know you want to stay here with us so stay with me now and I promise everything will be alright!“ Jemma is not sure if it will be alright, she’s aware that they must do something now because it’s the third time agent May is in this situation. Fitz bursts into agent May’s bunk followed by three medics.

„Simmons?!“

„Right here, Fitz!“

„Is she awake?“

„Yes, she’s fighting. Do you have the serum?“ She reaches her hand towards standing Fitz that looks at her with shock in his eyes.

„It’s not tested, Simmons, we can’t give it to her just like that.“

„Just have faith in me, okay?! Give it to me!“ He gives it out immediately but he’s still not sure if it’s the right thing to do. They’ve come up with something that should slow down the changes in her body. It should give them more time to finish the new version of the Framework but it’s a brand new serum that hasn’t been tested and it has its risks.

„Agent May, now listen to me. I’m going to inject you with something that will help you, okay? But I need you to stay awake in the process, can you do that?“ May nods with a painful expression. It’s a good sign, she still pays attention to what Jemma’s saying.

„Okay, it should hurt a little but it will be over in a moment so stay awake, okay?“

„Y-yes.“ Simmons takes her arm and finds a visible vein. It’s now or never, it can determines agent May’s future and Jemma is aware of this simple fact. She gives in and injects her with the serum. Once it’s all injected to May’s bloodstream, the only thing they can do is to wait. Fitz is standing there, carefully watching agent May’s reaction. He’s more into engineering than bio stuff but he knows what an untested serum can do to a human’s body.

„Do you feel anything?“ Jemma asks and focuses on Melinda’s expression.

„Aghhh…it-it burns…get that out of me, Simmons!“ May starts to shake.

„Do something, Jemma!“ Fitz is not the one of them who knows how this serum should work so he takes it as a bad news.

„It’s okay, it’s okay…just, give it moment.“

„Aghhh it’s killing me!“

„Actually, it’s saving your life but don’t focus on that pain….focus on…on something else, something nice…uhmmm…director Coulson, just focus on him…on his smile and bad jokes.“ Simmons is trying so hard to make her cooperate. May is visibly still in pain but Jemma doesn’t seem alarmed so Fitz assumes it’s all going according to her plan. After a few moments agent May stops shaking, she takes a deep breath and falls asleep.

„Oh God, Jemma, she fainted…what are we gonna do?“

„We take her to the lab, she needs some rest.“

„Wait, what? We needed her to stay awake and she’s fallen asleep, I think that’s a problem.“

„It’s not…the serum is supposed to do that, according to my calculations she’ll sleep for at least ten hours but let’s see, it wasn’t tested.“ Fitz seems shocked but he’s also glad that it worked and agent May is safe for now.

„You really need to tell me what exactly this green serum does.“

„Later, now get back to work.“


	25. Chapter 25

„Why is Talbot always so annoying?“ Frustrated Daisy asks Coulson as they’re leaving Talbot’s quarters.

„Hard to say…seems like some people are better in smaller doses, wouldn’t you agree?“ She laughs and they make their way to the plane. Mace is already seated in the cargo bay, both Daisy and Coulson cross their arms on their chest and wait for Mace to say something.

„I think it’s a good time to apologize for my…well, bad behavior, I didn’t know he was such a pain in the ass.“

„I thought you guys were friends.“ Daisy points out and Coulson nods.

„Yeah, it seemed like you two were quite a team.“

„Well, he just kinda chose me for this job and then never talked to me again so…“ Daisy rolls her eyes and nudges Coulson so he follows her. 

„So…how was the date?“ Daisy asks, not trying to hide her excitement.

„We talked.“

„And?“

„And what? We talked Daisy, what else do you want to know?“ Phil has always been a very private person, though it can’t be compared to May’s sense privacy. He thinks about that for a second, they’ll make a great couple. Well, they are a great couple. No, not a couple, soulmates as Melinda called that.

„I just want to know what’s up with you guys, you’ve always been the parents of our team so it’s okay if kids ask some questions from time to time.“ She winks and he has to shake is head, Daisy is unbelievable but she’s right about something – the team has always been a family, one big messy family. 

„Well, we’re kinda together.“

„Kinda? What does it mean in your language?“

„It’s not funny, Daisy.“

„Come ooooooooooon.“ She’s like a little kid and Coulson can’t help it, he has to smile at her pretending. It’s nice to have her back, it’s nice to be one big family again with her, Simmons, Fitz, Mack, Elena and May.

„It’s classified.“

„Not this damn thing again!“ She crosses her arms and sighs. He wants to make fun of her and say something funny but he’s interrupted by his mobile phone. He looks at the screen and freezes. Daisy can see a change in Coulson’s expression.

„Is everything alright?“

„It’s Simmons…“

„Then pick it up.“

„No…I mean, I’m…no, what if something bad happened and…no, I can’t.“

„Come on, pick it up, maybe it’s something important.“ Daisy tries to force him into answering the call. He takes a few deep breaths and touches the „answer“ button.

„Yes, Simmons, what’s up?“ Daisy is carefully watching every Coulson’s step and every single face he makes. It’s enough to know what’s happening.

„Oh my, God, is she okay?! Simmons, talk to me! What’s wrong?“ Daisy can’t hear Simmons‘ voice but it’s easy to guess what she’s saying. May had the shock again.

„Good, good, we’ll be in the base in 40 minutes. Take care of her, please…“ He hungs up, leaning against the cold wall of their plane. Daisy is by his side in a moment.

„What happened?“

„Guess what…“

„Is she…okay?“ She’s almost afraid to ask. He nods and takes another few deep breaths.

„She’s stable.“

„Good…so you want to be alone or?“ She wants to be there for him but she knows that sometimes it’s better to leave him alone with his own thoughts.

„I want her to be okay, Daisy. I want her to get out of this mess, I want her to be happy and I want her so it doesn’t really matter if I’m alone or not…damn, why are the bad things happening to someone like Melinda?“ He sits down on the nearest seat, defeated, tired and nervous. He feels like he’s failing Melinda and it hurts so much.

„She’ll get out of it. She’s the strongest person I know, Coulson. She’s a fighter. I know how you feel, I can’t lose her, too.“ She decides to be honest and say what’s on her heart. She also tries to encourage him to do the same. 

„She’s so important to me, Daisy, you can’t even imagine.“

„I know how it feels, Lincoln was very important to me, too.“ Their eyes meet and Phil doesn’t know what to say. She never talked about Lincoln before, never even mentioned him and now she’s talking about him openly. He does the only thing that comes into his mind and he gets up so he can hug her. He gently wraps his hand around her body and hugs her like a father would hug his daughter. She sinks in and whispers:

„She’ll be okay, she’ll be fine.“

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

Coulson and Daisy are back in the base, both heading downstairs to meet Simmons and Fitz. Coulson almost runs because he doesn’t want to waste any time. He gets to the scientist’s lab really fast, it takes him a few seconds to catch his breath.

„Simmons, we’re here. Is she…awake?“ Both Fitz and Simmons look away from their work at Coulson and Daisy.

„She’s awake. Actually, she was asking about you, sir.“

„I’m going to see her right now.“ Before he can reach the door, he’s stopped by Jemma’s voice.

„Sir, there is something I need to tell you.“ She exchanges a quick look with Fitz and then faces Coulson.

„What is it, Jemma?“

„There is a good and a bad thing you need to know…what do you want to hear first?“ She’s not really good at such talks so that’s probably why it sounds like some kind of a game for kids.

„Tell me the bad one first…“

„Okay, well…agent May’s problem has come to the point where we need to do something immediately or…or we’ll lose her forever…“ A very unpleasant silence follows Jemma’s voice. Both Fitz and Daisy are looking at Coulson, waiting for his reaction. It feels like the whole world just ended for him. He can’t lose her, not now that they are finally moving forward.

„A-and the good thing…“

„The new Framework is almost ready, there is just only one code missing so we thought Daisy could-.“ Jemma doesn’t have time to finish her thought as Daisy speaks up:

„Yes, I’ll do anything, just show me the codes and I’ll look into it. Let’s go.“ Yes, they can’t lose any more time.

„Jemma?“ Coulson asks with a very low voice, they almost can’t hear him.

„Yes, sir?“

„How much time…you know…is left for her?“ He’s usually good with his words but being overwhelmed with the things that are happening to his Melinda is enough to make him chaotic.

„I injected her with something I’d been working on and it should buy her some time but hard to say…less than one week, I assume.“ At least they still have some time, he thinks as he’s turning around and leaves to see Melinda.

He enters the room she’s in, surprised she’s not tied up to any devices. He doesn’t want her to know that he’s one big mess so he smiles straight away as their eyes meet. He doesn’t hesitate and gives her a kiss on her forehead and gently runs his hands through her hair. She smiles faintly and touches his arms.

„Phil?“

„I’m just happy to see you.“ He then moves a chair that is there closer so he can be as close as possible.

„You didn’t see me just for a few hours.“ She points out and he smiles again.

„For terribly long few hours. How are you feeling?“ He moves his human hand so it covers her smaller one. She’s cold and he doesn’t like it.

„I’m okay…well, as okay as I can be…“ He understands her statement.

„Aren’t you cold?“

„Sometimes…aghh…I don’t know, it’s been weird since Simmons gave me the green serum. Sometimes I’m freezing and sometimes I feel like there’s lava all around me and it’s just…annoying.“ Phil knows this is a serious thing but he can’t help the little smile forming on his lips as Melinda uses the word annoying. There is something adorable in the way she says that.

„What?“

„What what?“

„You were staring.“

„Busted.“ Phil doesn’t break the eye contact.

„Phil…“

„You’re beautiful.“ He says spontaneously and soon realises it was maybe too much. Her eyes widen and she looks away so he can’t see the effect those words has on her.

„Phil?...What…“

„Well, I am allowed to say that, right?“ He asks carefully and she looks at him again as if looking for a sign of a hidden joke or something. But there is nothing of that, only Phil’s sincere eyes and warm smile.

„You don’t have to say anything, by the way. I know that you’re not a fan of words so it’s okay if you don’t say anything back.“ He assures her that it’s okay to be quiet, that he doesn’t need her to be the talkative one.

„Thank you.“ She simply says and puts her other hand atop his warm human one. It’s a small gesture but for Phil it means a lot. 

„You’re always welcome. So, what are we going to do for the rest of the day?“

„What do you mean?“

„Well, I’m staying…if it doesn’t bother you, of course. We can just talk or maybe I can show you the place where I’m taking you after this mess.“ He sounds hopeful and that’s something Melinda doesn’t like. She knows that it’s pretty bad with her so she doesn’t want him to be so hopeful.

„Phil, stop with that.“

„No, I won’t.“

„You know as much as I do that my body is giving up and that I may just die.“ She says that like it means nothing.

„Your body may be giving up but what’s important is your mind. You can’t give up, Melinda. Just focus on the good.“

„What good?! You don’t get it Phil, I haven’t done anything in weeks, I haven’t been to any mission. I’m getting rusty…maybe it will be better if I d-.“

„Don’t! You’re not going to die, Melinda. Don’t you ever say that in front of me, okay? I just…I can’t do this without you so please, fight it.“ He kisses Melinda hand and strokes her soft skin with his thumb.

„I’m tired, Phil.“

„So you wanna sleep?“

„No, I mean, I’m emotionally drained and it hurts like hell.“

„Let’s just talk about something else. So, the place in Ireland, it’s a really nice area with a lot of pubs where we can just sit, enjoy ourselves and read books. I’ve already prepared some books and I strongly recommend you to prepare some, too…“

„Ireland? Really?“

„What’s wrong with Ireland?“ He asks innocently, almost like a little boy whose toy was taken away.

„I don’t know…it’s just, it’s not the place where I imagine spending my vacation in.“

„How about this, we’ll take…let’s say…one month off, two weeks for me and two weeks for you. How does that sound?“ 

„Two weeks in Ireland?!“

„No, one week in Ireland and one week in Australia.“

„Fine.“

„Let me guess, you’re taking us to Vegas aaaaand…Hawaii.“ Melinda throws her annoyed look at him.

„Not fair, you know me too well.“

„Is it a bad thing?“ He ask as he’s carefully putting the blanket back so it can cover her body. She just rolls her eyes at his doing.

„It depends…“ She smirks and he coughs.

„Ehm-hm I know this smirk, Melinda. You’re about to be naughty.“ She throws the same look at him once again.

„Shut up.“


	26. Chapter 26

„Damn it!“ Daisy’s typing some codes on her laptop but she can’t get the code they need right. Fitz knocks on the door and enters.

„Coffee break.“

„I don’t have time for coffee, Fitz.“ She doesn’t even look at him because there is no time for it either. Since he can do coding himself, he looks at what Daisy has. Nothing new, nothing that can change the Framework. 

„We have to do something now.“

„What are you talking about?“ She finally stops typing, turning her head in Fitz’s direction.

„You’re right, there is no time, agent May is dying and we haven’t moved with the new Framework. We must find a different way.“ They exchange a look, both of them looking desperate.

„I can’t come up with the code…it’s just…it doesn’t make any sense…“

„There is one person that knows the code for sure…“ They exchange a knowing look. 

„Radcliffe.“ Fitz nods and sips from his own mug.

„But I can’t go there, Fitz. I can’t even look at him without…you know.“ She reaches for her mug with coffee so she can mirror Fitz position. He sighs.

„I know but last time he was interogated it was quite effective.“

„He’ll kill him…“

„Well, he can after we get that code.“ Daisy frowns, it’s not what Fitz would normally say so it makes her worried a little bit.

„Fitz?“  
„Ughh…I’m sorry, I just don’t know what to do. I shouldn’t have trusted that man in the first place, if I hadn’t trusted him, we wouldn’t have been in this situation and agent May would--.“

„Maybe. Maybe not but it won’t help agent May. You have to stop blaming yourself.“

„How can I? Look at her, she’s…damn, it’s all my fault.“

„Fitz, come on. We can talk about this later, all of us…but now we need to save May, okay? Are you in this with me?“ She gently puts her hand on his shoulder and he nods, taking his phone so he can get the interrogation prepared.

„Someone has to tell Coulson.“

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

„…and sir, please, you need to control your anger because one wrong move can cause him serious harm and he may not be able to communicate with us anymore.“ Simmons and Fitz follow Coulson that is heading to the room where he’s supposed to interogate Radcliffe again.

„I won’t kill him, Simmons.“

„I know but I also know that deep inside you want to kill him so badly so that’s why I’m trying to explain you the results that your behavior may have.“ Coulson stops in front of a huge metal door and turn around so he’s facing both scientists. They immediately stop and wait for him to say something.

„What are you? A psychologist? Look, I’ll get the code…my way.“

He enters the room where there is Radcliffe, sitting on a seat. Their eyes meet for a second and Phil can see fear in Radcliffe’s ones. That’s good, he should be afraid.

„Owowo look who’s here, Phillip Coulson, the sadist.“

„Let’s just skip the compliments and get to the nitty-gritty, shall we?“ Coulson sits down in front of him. Radcliffe shivers and tries not to hold an eye contact with Coulson. He seems scared. Good, he should be.

„So…there is one last thing I need you to give me. You can tell me now and make it easier for you.“

„I want to see Agnes.“ Radcliffe says with a firm voice.

„So you give me what I want and I give you what you want in return. That’s how it works.“ Coulson takes out a tablet where he wants Radcliffe to type the code.

„Well, last time I didn’t get anything, just some punches in the face so why should I trust you now?“ Radcliffe can be beaten up, tired and weak but he’s still the same sly bastard, always looking for something for himself.

„You’re not in a position to set conditions. Here, we need this missing code, you have five minutes to give it out.“

„Or?“ Coulson just gets up and only this move makes a huge impact on Radcliffe who is now covering his face with both of his hands, trying to avoid a punch from him.

„Please, don’t punch me, please, I’ll give you everything you want, just don’t hurt her.“ Something about the „don’t hurt her“ part makes Coulson feel sorry for the man in the seat. 

„Look, I won’t hurt her and I won’t hurt you…I’m not going to be like you.“ Radcliffe still has his hands on his face, now it seems more like he’s ashamed so that’s why he’s still covering his face.

„I didn’t want to hurt anyone, I just wanted to create a world where Agnes could be happy and healthy. I may seem like an absolute lunatic but I care about her, only about her…“ Coulson’s heart skips a beat after hearing this. He can pretty much relate to feelings of this man.

„Yes, she’s very important to you as much as Melinda is important to me. You can’t undo what’s been done but now you have a chance to make it right so please…give me the code and I promise I’ll let you keep the Framework for Agnes.“ Radcliffe looks into Coulson’s eyes, not quite sure if the he means it but the honesty in Coulson’s look wins over Radcliffe’s doubts.

„I’ll do that…under one condition.“

„Yes?“

„You’ll let me be in the Framework with Agnes.“

„Of course.“ Coulson gets up and pats Radcliffe on his back, leaving him to his work. And Radcliffe really types the code down, helping them with the new Framework.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

„How could I miss it? It’s so simple.“ Daisy is trying to come up with the reason why she didn’t get the code right because it’s quite a simple code in the end. 

„Okay, it’s done.“ Fitz makes a few steps from the device so others can see it. Simmons gently strokes his arm and offers him a wide smile, they did it.

„Let’s get it to agent May, we can’t lose any more time.“

„Yes.“

They enter her room and find Coulson sitting by May’s bed, talking to her with a very soft voice. They both turn to the rest of their team.

„We were able to finish the Framework…“ Both Melinda and Phil know what it means. They exchange a look and May speaks up:

„Can we have a moment alone?“ Fitz, Simmons and Daisy nod, leaving them alone in the room for a while. As the door is closed, Coulson is about to say something but is stopped by Melinda’s voice:

„No, don’t say anything at all, now it’s my turn to tell you something so listen. I don’t want you to react in any way, understood?“ He hesitates for a second but then gives in, nods and prepares for what Melinda has to say.

„I’m not really good with my words but I want you to know something, before I get myself to that hell again...you mean a lot to me, Phil…a lot and I think it’s safe to say that I…I l-love you.“ He opens his mouth to say the same words back but she cuts him off again:

„No, no, no, don’t say anything, don’t make it harder for me, just…I want you to know this. You can call them back.“ She doesn’t keep an eye contact with him because she’s not used to saying such words. He respects her wish and doesn’t say a word, he only bends down and kisses her cheek. He calls Simmons and Fitz in. They are getting the device on May and after a while, she closes her eyes and her mind disappears to the new Framework.

„Okay, now we wait.“ Says Fitz and bites his thumb.


	27. Chapter 27

„What do we do now?“ Coulson asks and looks at sleeping Melinda again. She looks so peaceful, there is no sign of any kind of discomfort.

„We wait…“ Answers Fitz and checks some parameters on the device that is tied up to Melinda’s head. 

„Just wait? Isn’t there anything I can do?“ Coulson knows he’s not an expert when it comes to science and technology but he doesn’t want to just wait, he wants to help her.

„Actually, you can stay here, maybe talk to her a little bit. People in this state are usually very responsive when it comes to hearing familiar voices so I think it wouldn’t hurt to have someone down here, talking to agent May but if it’s a problem for you, sir--.“

„I’ll do that. I’ll stay here with her.“ He is not sure if he’ll be able to just talk to her, knowing she won’t say anything back, but he wants to be the one who’s by her side when she wakes up. Simmons smiles and tells others to leave the room. 

Coulson sits down next to Melinda’s bed. He’s looking at her calm face, not feeling to start his little one-sided talk just yet. He still can’t get over her beauty, he’s always thought she is pretty but now that they’ve put their old boundary away, he’s aware of that even more – her soft tanned skin, long wavy hair and chocolate eyes are like a huge trap for men, but this is not what Phil adores the most about her – he loves her heart, her smile and the scars that made her the person she is now. 

„So…I don’t know if you know this but I prefer hot chocolate over coffee…“ It’s very awkward, he knows she can’t respond and maybe even hear him but he just have to make sure she feels his presence.

„And I know you’d roll your eyes but you make the best hot chocolate and I’d kill to have a cup with you right now…“

„I wonder if you’d talk to me like that, too.“ A familiar female voice interrupts his awkward talk with Melinda. 

„Audrey…“

„May I?“ She points at a chair that is next to Phil’s one. He nods and Audrey smiles. They are sitting in a silence, both wondering what they are supposed to say.

„Okay, look, this silence is killing me. There are so many things we need to talk about…Audrey…I…I am so sorry, I’m so sorry for everything…“ Phil starts with an apologize that Audrey deserves. 

„Phil, I had a great time with you, amazing 5 years, there is nothing to say sorry to.“ She’s always so sweet and gentle, it’s killing him because he knows he’s supposed to do more than just apologize. 

„No Audrey, I wasn’t the best boyfriend…I definitely wasn’t one you deserved. I kept things from you because that’s what I did for a living and it wasn’t fair.“

„There is only one thing that wasn’t fair, Phil, and it wasn‘t your job.“ She casts down her eyes, looking at her hands.

„I-I must admit I wasn’t totally honest about my feelings. I mean, I liked you a lot but…“ He thinks for a moment, wondering how he should name it.

„But it wasn’t the wow thing, I understand. I can’t blame you for that because we don’t know what the wow moment is like until we experience it. I just want you to know that I don’t regret any day spent with you. You made my life more exciting, I guess. Now I’m not afraid of flying anymore.“ She laughs and it forces Phil to laugh as well. 

„Phil…I hope you’ll be happy with Melinda. I can see that you guys are meant to be together. You make a great couple.“ It’s kinda weird to hear those words from Audrey but it makes him happy anyway. He’s glad he’s not the only one thinking they’re a great couple. 

„Thank you, Audrey.“

„So, is Melinda going to be alright?“ Audrey asks with a hopeful voice. It makes Phil shiver. He doesn’t really know, he can’t say, he can only hope. 

„She has to be alright.“ Audrey puts her small hand on his shoulder and doesn’t say anything else. He doesn’t need words, he needs Melinda.


	28. Chapter 28

„…and then I ran into a very strange person, I didn’t know it was him until he spoke up and it was just crazy, you should have been there.“ Phil is ranting on about some random things as he’s still sitting next to Melinda’s bed.

„Come on, it’s time to wake up. It’s time to be my Melinda again.“ He personally doesn’t know how long until she wakes up but it feels like the time’s here. Or at least should be. After a while he can hear a gentle knock on the door.

„Sir?“

„Yes, Simmons?“

„Wow, you’re still here. I didn’t expect you to be here for so long.“ She states and then feels stupid for saying. Of course he’s still here, it’s Phil Coulson, waiting for Melinda May to wake up.

„Are you going to check on her?“ He asks and makes some room for her. She checks something on a laptop that is connected to the device that is on May’s head and then she checks her pulse. 

„Nothing out of normal.“

„Which means?“

„We need to wait.“

„Simmons, we’ve been waiting the whole day. I think something is supposed to happen, no?“ He badly wants her to be okay and to wake up. He’s okay with staying overnight but it’d be better to be sure she’s okay.

„Now there is nothing else we can do, sir. It’s all up to agent May.“

„Tell me one more thing.“ He calls after her as she’s making her way to the door again. She stops and offers him a friendly smile.

„Yes?“

„What kind of a simulation is Melinda at this time? Is it the same one or a different one?“ 

„Uhmm I’m not sure, Fitz programmed the simulation but it’s different for sure. He said he changed the parameters so it doesn’t feel right for agent May.“ That’s all she can say about the new Framework, all she knows.

„Doesn’t feel right?“

„Yes, agent May must snap out of it on her own so it can’t be something she likes or is used to. It must feel weird.“ He understands now, it’s something that can’t keep Melinda in forever. 

„Thank you, Jemma.“

„You’re welcome sir, do you want to bring any food or water?“ She asks politely, hoping she can do something for him. 

„It’s all good, thank you.“ She smiles once again and leaves him alone with May again. He runs his human hand through her hair.

„Where are you now, Melinda?“

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

_Everything’s weird, everything is … just…weird. She wakes up in a very comfortable bed, surrounded by modern furniture. She doesn’t recognize the room, though. She’s just about to get up when a familiar voice catches her attention. It’s coming from the next room. Andrew._

_„Mommy is still sleeping, baby, but I can find your toy for you. Is that alright?“_

_„Yes, daddy.“_

_„Here you go, angel.“ Melinda frowns, where the hell is she? What’s this place? She slowly gets up, making sure she doesn’t make any noise. She stops by the door and looks into the room. Andrew is bending down next to a little girl, smiling down at her with his perfect teeth. The girl is playing with a small teddy bear._

_„Oh, look who’s up.“ Andrew notices her and the girl looks up at her with a wide smile._

_„Mommy.“ Melinda freezes. Mommy? She’s not a mother, she’s never been anyone’s mother. What kind of a terrible joke is this?_

_„How did you sleep?“ Andrew asks, not looking at her directly. He’s busy playing with the girl that is probably his and her daughter that she doesn’t remember. They are in a house she doesn’t remember. She keeps saying to herself that it’s just a dream and that she’ll snap out of it soon._

_„Melinda?“_

_„I…uh…slept okay and you?“ Or maybe it’s a trap so she needs to play along so they don’t get suspicious._

_„Well, you came home pretty late so you kinda woke me up but no worries, I’m used to it.“ He laughs and strokes the girl’s hair. It’s very unnatural for Melinda to witness something like that. Andrew is dead and if there’s someone playing God then she’s ready to kick his or her ass because it’s not right to bring people back to life…wait, bring people back to life…Phil…where’s Phil? She needs to get to him and solve this problem._

_„Where’s Phil?“ She asks, what a stupid question…but she needs to know._

_„Who’s Phil?“ Andrew frowns and gets up. Now he’s facing her. It’s been a while since she saw him like that._

_„Phil, my partner…coworker…shorter guy with blue eyes, he looks like an accountant, a really awkward accountant.“ Andrew frowns once again._

_„I don’t really know about whom you’re talking about, Melinda. You work only with Victoria.“ Wait, she works only with Victoria…Andrew doesn’t know Phil, which means that she probably doesn’t know him in this…world, dream, whatever it is. Her heart skips a beat. The room is suddenly filled with a loud cry of a baby. Melinda didn’t notice before that there was a cradle in the room, too._

_„Could you please take him? I’m going to fix us something to eat.“ He takes the little girl in his giant arms and leaves Melinda alone in the room. Well, not so alone, there is this little guy that is supposed to be her son but he’s not. He can’t be, she’s never had any baby so he can’t be her son. She moves closer, looking at the little guy. He’s so tiny…_

_„Uhm, hello?“ She is so awkward but the baby seems to be fine with that. He stops crying and looks up at her. She’s pretty sure that those are her eyes but it can’t be true._

_„You’re not my baby, you know…I’ll make sure you’ll get your mommy back but I’m not your mommy.“ He seems confused, well, as much as a baby can be confused, really._

_„Don’t look at me like that. Like you know me. I don’t know you…this is ridiculous, where’s Phil while I need him the most? See, baby? Phil’s on my mind, not your daddy…I need to find Phil and make everything alright. I want back…“ She doesn’t know why she said the last words, I want back…it comes from the weird feeling she has about this morning, about this reality. She wants back. Back to Phil…Fitz, Simmons, Daisy…she closes her eyes and focus on them, she doesn’t open them but it seems like something’s happening, she’s falling somewhere…everything’s spinning…_

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

„Okay, I’m running out of topics to talk about, not that I’m not talkative enough but it’s hard to keep talking to someone who’s not saying anything back…“ Phil actually enjoys this alone moment with Melinda, he can at least collect his thoughts before she wakes up.

„Okay, it’s just me or you just moved with your nose?“ He doesn’t know if it’s just his desire to see Melinda moving again or if it’s really happening. He gives it time and Melinda moves again, now her hand is reaching for his.

„Melinda? Mel? Are you back?“ She suddenly opens her eyes.


	29. Chapter 29

„Hey, Mel, are you with me?“ He whispers, doesn’t really know why, it’s not like he can wake her up or something. Their eyes meet and Phil takes her hand to his bigger one.

„Talk to me, please…“ She takes a couple of deep breaths before she speaks:

„Are you real?“ This question surprises him, why would she ask something like that? Of course he’s real, it’s not like he’s a robot or something. At least he hopes so.

„Yes?“

„Phil.“

„I mean, yes, I’m real. Why are you asking?“ He doesn’t want her to get tired but it worries him.

„It’s…nothing.“

„How do you feel?“ Another important question that he needs her to answer. Before she can roll her eyes and tell him she’s fine, Simmons and Fitz rushes into the room.

„Agent May, welcome back.“

„Are you in pain, agent May?“ Phil smiles down at her, he knows she doesn’t like this exaggerated care. 

„My head hurts.“ She admits and looks away.

„It’s perfectly fine…I mean, it’s supposed to hurt. So…we’ll do some tests now and then you’ll be free to go.“

„Sooo…let’s do the tests, shall we?“ Fitz smiles and Jemma mirrors his expression. They are both happy agent May is back because it was all just one big risk. 

„Do you want me to be here with you?“ Phil’s hopeful question makes Melinda smile. He’s such a dork, he can be the great director of SHIELD but to Melinda, Phil Coulson is always a dork.

„No but I expect you to pick me up after those annoying tests.“ Melinda winks at him and he nods. Fitz and Simmons noticed the wink and they exchange a knowing look.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

„So, is May okay?“ Daisy bursts into Jemma’s lab.

„Oh my, GOD, Daisy, what the…I’m trying to work and you…don’t do that ever again, you scared me, JESUS.“ Daisy has never heard Jemma speaking like that and she’d probably comment on that but right now it’s not the important thing.

„Whatever…so how about May?“ 

„Well, the tests seem alright. Now it depends on agent May.“

„What do you mean?“ Daisy frowns and sits down on a huge sofa that is there. She has some missions to prepare for but right now it’s not what’s on her mind. She wants her SO back.

„Uhm she’s okay but it’s still a game in her mind, I mean, now she has to deal with everything she’s seen in both frameworks and it’s not gonna be easy but I’m positive about it, agent May is a very strong person and she has us.“ Jemma smiles at Daisy and Daisy smirks.

„Yeah, she also has a very strong support from Coulson. I guess that’s her favorite part hah.“

„Well, they are a good couple.“ Jemma doesn’t really know what to say. She knows what agent May and director Coulson mean to each other but she’s not one to gossip about other people.

„A good couple? Are you kidding me? They are perfect, look at them…they are a power couple from a textbook on power couples, seriously.“ Daisy seems to be very happy for them, it almost looks like she’s their biggest fan, which wouldn’t be a huge surprise. 

„Yes, they are meant to be together.“ Jemma’s voice is always very gentle and soft.

„Can you please give me the tablet that is on that table?“ Jemma doesn’t look at Daisy at all, just points at a tablet that is lying on a small table right next to the sofa. Daisy gets up with the tablet and goes to Jemma.

„Here you go, doc.“

„What are you up to anyway?“ Jemma’s grown into being a workaholic so it’s always strange to see people doing nothing. Daisy freezes.

„Damn, mission…thanks, Jemma.“ And with those words she runs out of the lab. Jemma just shakes her head and smiles.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

„Sooo, ready to move to yours?“ Phil asks Melinda as she’s collecting her things. Finally, she’s able to move her things to her bunk. It’s been a long time since she felt somewhere like at home. 

„You have no idea.“

„Hah, I guess you’ll love the surprise I’ve prepared for you.“ Right after saying this Phil realizes he’s probably said more than he should have. He kinda just said he has a surprise for her so it’s not a surprise anymore. At least she doesn’t know what it is.

„A surprise?“

„Yes, I thought it’d be nice to…well, you’ll see.“ He smiles at her and help her with her bag. He knows she hates it when someone tries to help her but she’s still a little shaken after her another framework experience so she allows Phil to carry the bag for her. He’s happy he can help and his happiness makes her herself happy.

They appear by Melinda’s door pretty soon, she can’t wait to get back to her safe little bunk that she loves so much. Phil opens the door for her and let her go in first. Always a gentleman.

„Welcome back.“ Phil puts the bag down and get closer to her. 

„It’s good to be back.“ She states. Phil comes closer to her and he slowly covers her eyes with his hands. She can paralyze him in about one hundred different ways from this position but she only tenses.

„The surprise, remember?“ He whispers and she nods. He walks her to her bathroom. It smells like roses and orange in there.

„Ready?“ He breathes in as he’s whispering the words to her ear. She still smells amazing, he thinks. She only nods and he gets his hand away. She blinks a few times, indeed very surprised.

Her bath is full of rose petals and there is a huge amount of foam as well. It looks very relaxing and she suddenly feels a huge wave of emotions. She can’t believe someone has fixed this for her. She can’t believe she is so lucky to have someone like Phil in her life.

„You don’t like it, do you?“ He says with a disappointed voice. He wants to add that it’s okay but she turns around and looks into his eyes.

„It’s…amazing.“

„Really?“ Phil puts his boyish expression on and smiles.

„Really.“

„Wow, I’m glad you like it. Oh, one more thing.“ He disappears for a second and then comes back with some candles.

„I hope you still remember that I’m a hopeless romantic.“ They both laugh as he’s arranging the candles so Melinda can enjoy this sweet atmosphere.

„Thank you, Phil.“ Their eyes meet and he takes it as a sign so he lowers his head and slowly moves closer. She waits for him to reach her lips and then they kiss. Finally, after all those years they kiss and it feels fantastic. Phil tries to be as gentle as possible. Melinda stops, though. 

„I’m…I’m sorry, I just…feel dizzy.“

„Well, I’ve been told I’m a great kisser but I honestly didn’t expect to be that great.“ He laughs and she rolls her eyes at his words.

„It’s all very overwhelming, the Framework and…“

„It’s okay, Melinda. I’ll leave you to this now, you deserve it.“ He gives her one last kiss on her forehead and turns around so he can leave but she stops him.

„Phil, stay?“

„You want me to stay?“ 

„I mean, will you be there when I’m finished?“ 

„Of course.“ He assures her and leaves her alone in her bathroom.


	30. Chapter 30

Phil waits for Melinda to finish her bath time. He doesn’t really mind, she deserves some rest that is not related to any kind of framework she has experienced. He’s sure she must be hungry so he makes a simple meal for her. After this he lays down on her bed, waiting for her.

She slowly opens the door, dressed up in an old baggy SHIELD t-shirt and shorts. He thinks she looks stunning, it doesn’t really matter what kind of closthes she has on. He quickly sits up.

„Hey.“

„Hey.“ She makes her way to the bed and Phil gets up, making room for her. He doesn’t want to push her or something, he just wants her to be comfortable and happy, that’s his current mission.

„How did you enjoy the bath?“ He sounds a bit cocky because he knows he’s put a lot of effort into making the bath perfect. She smirks and throws a t-shirt at him.

„It wasn’t bad.“

„It wasn’t bad? Come on, Melinda, I know it was perfect. And…what is this?“ He points at the t-shirt, not sure what kind of a message this is.

„Well, it was one of the better baths I’ve had so far…it’s a t-shirt.“ She says that with a very innocent voice, it almost makes him laugh. 

„Yeah, sure, a t-shirt, but why?“

„You’re not staying?“ She asks, visibly very surprised. It’s still pretty new between them and they are both trying to figure out the boundaries.

„Well, am I? I mean, staying?“

„If you don’t want to, then it’s oka--.“

„I want to! I mean, I’d like to stay if that’s okay for you.“ She smirks again and takes a spoon with Phil’s food into her mouth.

„Mmmm this is so good.“ She seems satisfied and it warms Phil heart. She likes his food, good, that’s good to know.

„Thank you, I’m flattered.“ Phil takes off his shirt and tries to put on the t-shirt as soon as possible but Melinda stops him by touching his chest right above his heart. He swallows and looks down at her small delicate hand that is resting over the awful scar he has on his chest. 

„Melinda…“

„We’ve been…through a lot of crap…“ Her voice is quiet, it’s almost like a whisper. He nods, looking at her face.

„We deserve some happiness…“ He grabs her hand into his bigger ones and looks into her eyes with his puppy eyes.

„You deserve the world.“

„It’s scary…“ She whispers and he nods again, not letting go of her hand. 

„Yes, it is but we are where we are supposed to be. Finally.“ She looks down at his scar again, he feels pretty self-aware when it comes to the scar, the bad feeling that someone’s watching him every time he changes his clothes, it’s been bothering him since the TAHITI thing but Melinda’s touch on the scar makes him feel loved.

„Finally.“ She nods and smiles up at him. He kisses her forehead and then turns around to make her pillows more comfortable for sleeping.

„Come on, let’s get some sleep.“

„Phil, I was unconscious most of the time, I don’t need to sleep.“

„Simmons said you needed some rest and it includes sleeping so please, come here and rest.“ He points at the pillow and the only thing she can do is to roll her eyes and give in. She lays down next to him and he welcomes her in his embrace. She doesn’t push him away, doesn’t fight. He gives her one last kiss on her forehead, which seems to be something he likes to do, and they are both ready to fall asleep.

„Good night, Lin.“

„Lin?“ She asks him with a curious tone in her voice.

„I kinda always wanted to call you like that but I didn’t want to get a black eye from one of your boyfriends.“ He confesses.

„Just don’t call me like that in front of other people.“

„Your wish is my command, general.“

„Phil?“

„Yeah?“

„Let’s just sleep.“

„Night-night.“ He pulls her closer and smiles like an idiot.


	31. Chapter 31

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> May goes to Fitz for some answers
> 
>  
> 
> *I do not own the image and the characters  
> source of the image: Google"  
> ^^

„May I come in?“ It’s a late night and Fitz is just about to turn all computers off so he can go to sleep. He hasn’t slept in two days and it’s the right time to give it a try again. Agent May’s voice stops him, though. He looks over at her, she’s leaning on the door frame with a book in her hands.

„Yes, sure, come in. Is there anything I can do for you?“ He asks with a concern in his voice. She shakes her head and moves closer to him. She hands him the book and his heart skips a beat, it’s the book about dragons he basically threw at her one day she wanted to give up.

„It’s yours, as far as I remember.“ He hesitates for a second and then he takes it from her, looking at the picture of a red dragon that’ll in his mind forever.

„You can borrow it anytime you want.“ He says and looks into her eyes to make sure he means it. She sits on his desk and smirks.

„I hope it won’t be needed.“

„Yeah, though dragons are still interesting.“ He laughs and opens the book to go through some pages.

„Thank you, Fitz.“ May says after a while. 

„I thank you, agent May. You did the same thing for me back then.“ She smiles at him, which is quite scary considering the fact that she rarely smiles and never at him, but he mirrors the smile.

„There is…a thing I’d like to ask you about.“ May starts and looks away. Fitz is pretty tired but he doesn’t want to reject agent May, not after all she’s been through.

„Yes?“

„You were the one who created the new simulation?“ 

„What simulation?“ He knows what she is talking about but he asks anyway, it gives him some time to think of a good answer.

„The new Framework, the simulation…it was…you know.“ She doesn’t want to talk about it, yet she wants to know why.

„Y-yes, it was me.“ Is all he says, hoping it’s enough to her. 

„Why?“

„I needed to create a simulation you’d want to escape…“ 

„But how did you know I’d want to escape it? She asks with a very sad voice. Fitz wishes he was in a different room right now – facing agent May while she’s angry is one thing but facing her while she’s sad is a whole different situation.

„B-because it’s not who you are. It’s not a place where you are supposed to be. You are supposed to be here, with us, fighting the bad guys, taking care of us…that’s who you are, agent May, you are the protector, the person that keeps the team together…I wish you could see us without you, I almost got into fight with Mack, director Coulson threatened us and almost killed Radcliffe…we need you.“ It’s probably the first time Fitz speaks like that in front of her. He’s a very collected young man that can keep his emotions under check but right now there is a whole different Fitz standing in front of her. She doesn’t say anything because she’s speechless. She tries to find the right words but it’s not possible, not now that she is overwhelmed by Fitz rant.

„I’m sorry I got you into this position, agent May, but you need to know how important you are to us. We can’t function without you…“ Melinda is not good at dealing with her emotions and right now it’s particularly difficult. 

„I don’t know what to say.“ She admits and Fitz gently smiles.

„It’s okay, agent May. You don’t have to say anything at all. I’m glad you’re back.“ He says honestly.

„Time to go.“ She taps twice on his back.

„Huh?“

„You look like you haven’t slept in days.“ He nods and together they leave the lab.


	32. Chapter 32

Melinda makes sure Fitz is in his room, sleeping, and then she makes her way to the common area. She doesn’t feel like sleeping just yet and she doesn’t want to be stuck in her bunk so the common area is the right choice. She also needs to think some things through – the morning was quite weird for her. She woke up in Phil’s arms in her bed that still smells like Phil. She wasn’t scared, though, it felt right.

She’s surprised to find Daisy and Phil sitting on a huge couch that is there. She doesn’t want to ruin their moment so she stops next to the door and tries to catch what they are talking about. She’s a spy, after all, and she needs to get back to her spy regime.

„It’s ridiculous, I can’t find it anywhere.“ Daisy complains with her laptop on her legs. Coulson seems to be interested only in his snack.

„Well, maybe we should go to some local shops, I think it’s not a common thing on the Internet.“ He points out and Daisy rolls her eyes.

„Come on, everything’s on the Internet, we just need to keep digging.“ Phil takes another bite of his snack and makes himself more comfortable on the couch.

„Okay then, do it your way, I’ll do it my way.“ She accepts the challenge with a smirk and then she bites from his snack with a loud laugh.

„Hey! It’s my snack, not fair!“

„I’m just helping you, you know.“ She takes another bite and then there isn’t any other way than to let her take the rest of the snack. He crosses his arms as if he’s seriously upset.

„Helping with what?“

„Come on, we all know that you need to be fit now that you and May are finally together.“ He throws a confused look at Daisy and she laughs.

„Why would I need to be fit? I mean, I want to be fit but it doesn’t make any sense.“

„Ahhh AC, look at her, she’s gorgeous…haven’t you noticed how men always stare at her? I think you need to work twice as hard to destroy this competition.“

„Well, I have a robotic hand.“ He states and she makes a disgusted face.

„Blewwww gross, I could have lived without this image.“ He laughs and runs his hand through his hair.

„I mean, I have a robotic hand so I can scare the competition away, I’m also a director of a worldwide badass organisation. It adds to my sex-appeal, doesn’t it?“ He looks over at her with a wide smile on his face.  
She closes her laptop and laughs. Melinda thinks it’s the right time to step in, she doesn’t want them to talk about her like that.

„Oh, hey May.“

„Hey.“ His face brightens as he’s getting up from his warm place on the couch.

„Do you want to sit down?“ He asks and Daisy gets up as well.

„So, time for me to go, guys, have fun.“ She winks at Coulson and he feels like throwing a pillow at her. May smirks and sits on a table that is just a few steps from the couch. Phil sits down again, looking at the package of snacks that is right next to him. He covers that with a pillow and looks back at Melinda with a smile. She shakes her head and smirks, knowing why he did what he did. It’s her Phil…something evil crosses her mind as she’s staring at him. 

She hops down of the table and leans on it. She takes a few deep breaths, then covers her mouth with her hand. Phil’s eyes widen and he’s up in a second.

„Oh my, God, what’s happening? May? Melinda? Talk to me?!“ He’s by her side, taking her to his arms and looking down at her.

„P-Phil…I-I…I can’t breathe.“ She rests her head on his chest.

„No, no, no, no, no, please…not again, Melinda stay with me, please!“ His voice is so desperate, he’s taking his mobile out of his pocket but Melinda’s laughter stops him. He freezes.

„Melinda? Why are you laughing?“ She laughs so hard that she has to lean on the table to stay on her feet. Phil finally understands what is happening.

„Melinda, what the hell?! Did you just prank me?“

„Yes, that’s what I did.“ She crosses her arms, still laughing. He doesn’t seem to be so amused, though.

„You’re the worst prankster ever! The most terrible one! How can you make fun of things like that?!“ He’s yelling at her with teary eyes. He’s not sure if he’s mad at himself for not seeing through May’s prank or at Melinda for pulling a prank like that.

„Phil? Are you crying?“ He quickly wipes his eyes with the back of his hand, then he looks away, blinking.

„No, it’s just…I have something in my eye.“ Melinda touches his hand, forcing him to look at her again. 

„Phil…“

„Okay, okay, okay…yes, I was crying, okay? I was but it’s your fault!“ She smiles at him, a warm feeling running through her veins. 

„I’m sorry, I didn’t think you’d react like that.“ 

„Yeah, now you know so don’t you ever do that again.“

„Are you mad at me?“ She asks as their eyes meet. He shakes her head and kisses her cheek.

„I’m just happy you’re back.“

„Yeah, me too.“


	33. Chapter 33

„Melinda Qiaolian May, what do you think you’re doing?“ Phil crosses his arms as he stops by the gym. She’s weightlifting but Phil’s voice makes her stop. She throws the most innocent look in his direction.

„It’s Qiaolian but close enough.“

„Don’t go there, Melinda. Why are you working out at such hour?“ It’s almost 11pm and the whole base is already asleep, except for Melinda and Phil.

„Ughh...you don’t need to babysit me all the time, I already went on a mission, I’m fine.“ She’s trying to explain the situation but Phil only shakes his head.

„No, now we’re going to sleep…and tomorrow we’re jogging in the morning, okay?“ He knows that he must offer something, otherwise Melinda wouldn’t be amused at all. She only smirks and throws her wet towel at him. 

„I’m surprised, who’d say that woman like you can produce so much sweat?“ They like to tease each other like that.

„Well, I’m special.“

„Yes, you are very special.“ Phil’s eyes always betray him because they always show the real emotions, now they are full of adoration. Melinda smiles and takes off her shirt. Phil’s eyes widen.

„Melinda, what the hell…“

„What? I’m just changing my top, would you be so nice and hand the the t-shirt that is in the corner?“ She makes a very seductive face and it takes him longer to actually get what she wants. They haven’t been intimate yet, Phil had a lot of missions and Melinda was pretty weak so they have been fine with occasional cuddling. Phil doesn’t really mind, though. He’s been waiting for over twenty years so he can wait another week or so. Melinda, on the other hand, has been quite suggestive in the last few days and Phil still can’t decide whether it’s on purpose or not.

„Thank you.“

„You’re welcome.“ He smiles at her and carefully watches her as she’s puttint the shirt on. She’s aware, he’s sure about that.

„I have a surprise for you.“ He continues, reaching for something to his bag.

„Mmm what is it, Coulson?“ She uses his last name on purpose, it’s not that she’s not okay with calling him Phil. He hands her a paper.

„What is it?“ She asks.

„Our filled and signed vacation documents. We’re taking a month off, finally.“ He sounds excited and that’s exactly what he is – excited. Melinda reads through the paper in her hand. Hawaii – Las Vegas – Ireland – Australia. All the places they were talking about.

„Is that for real?“ She’s not sure he actually means it, it’s like a dream and given the situation Melinda was in, she needs to be sure it’s for real. His smile is wider as he’s taking her hand to his bigger one.

„Yes, it’s for real. We are leaving our duties behind for a couple of weeks.“

„We’ll get crazy after a few days.“ She points out and he laughs at her words.

„Yeah, I guess so but we’ll be there together, keeping each other sane.“ She nods and smiles up at him.

„Sooo, can I book a hotel in Vegas?“ 

„Melinda, I warn you, don’t book any inappropriate hotel. I’m not going to sleep among stuffed animals or other crazy stuff.“ He knows she loves Vegas for a reason – the fun – and he’s not one to be thrilled by all those crazy things that are happening over there.

„Spoilsport.“

„I am one for a reason.“ 

„Sooo…do others know about it or?“

„Yeah, I kinda told them about it.“

„And? How did they take it?“ He shrugs and lets her hand go. 

„Ok…I guess.“

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

„WHAT?!“ Daisy raises her voice and others move away so her voice won’t damage their ears next time.

„Well, we haven’t had any vacation in a long time so we thought now it’d be the right time.“

„It’s an amazing plan, sir. I highly recommend this for agent May, she needs some time off.“ Jemma supports his idea and Fitz and Mack both nod.

„Yes, we’ll take care of SHIELD, no worries.“ Mace speaks up as well and he exchanges a knowing look with Phil.

„You guys are really taking a month off?“ Daisy still seems to be surprised.

„Yeah, we’ll head to our favorite destinations.“

„That’s so romantic.“ Elena comments on Phil’s words and he smiles, more to himself than to others, though.

„Does it mean that you are moving to another phase of your relationship?“ Daisy is, withouth a doubt, the most curious girl Phil’s ever met.

„What do you mean by another phase?“ He’s confused.

„Well, you know, living together, getting up together, having--.“

„Daisy!“ Mace stops her because he can guess what she’s going to say next.

„What? Having a great life together, that’s what I wanted to say.“ Phil shakes his head and heads out of the common area.

„It’s classified.“

„NOOOOOOOO.“ Daisy is never thrilled by this reply.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

„So, we are free to go?“

„We are free to go.“ He comfirms and she nods. She is not the one to be overly excited and to show her excitement but he knows she’s happy, he can see the happiness in her eyes and that’s all he needs to see.

„When are we leaving, by the way?“ She asks a very important question and he smirks.

„Tomorrow.“

„What?“

„Yeah, you better get ready.“ He wishes he had a camera on him because Melinda’s expression is hilarious.

„Phil…“

„Hey, it’s gonna be great, I’m sure about that.“ She nods and makes her way to the door but Phil crosses her path. She looks up at him, confused.

„I think you forgot something.“ He lowers his head down, waiting for her to kiss him on the cheek. She just shakes her head and kiss him on his lips instead. Phil’s surprised a bit but then he gives in and kisses Melinda back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo this is the last episode of this story BUT I'm going to make another separated story about their little vacation haha :) I want to thank you for an amazing feedback and for being patient with my English - you know, being from the Czech Republic doesn't make it easy haha but I do my best. Again, thank you very much guys! <3


End file.
